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21

New NCAA Rules

Posted by HenryJames on February 12th, 2010 under Football

The Link The NCAA’s Football Rules Committee proposed some new rules yesterday that could have a pretty significant impact on college football next season.
23

Mexican Soccer Fan

Posted by Trips Right on August 16th, 2009 under

Look, we all get it deep down at some level regardless of political affiliations. A country that falls into drug trafficking induced choas can't be all that great. Predictably, the nation that generally sucks at being a serious country, spawns people that suck at being soccer fans. We saw a hint of this phenomenon when Mexican fans chanted Osama!! Osama!! during the U.S. vs. Mexico Olympic qualifier in 2007.
28

To Catch a Predator

Posted by Scipio Tex on August 6th, 2009 under Football

Welcome to To Catch A Predator. I'm Chris Hansen with Dateline NBC. I ambush men who think they're going to have sex with underage teens and make their boners go away. Then, with the help of law enforcement, we rehabilitate them by sending them away to be raped by Aryan prison gangs. Like Nancy Grace, I possess significant moral authority by virtue of the fact that
82

Buck Burnette leaves team

Posted by Huckleberry on November 5th, 2008 under Football

"due to violation of team rules." Houston Chronicle blurb here Reality is apparently that the violation of team rules involves posting something on his Facebook page that wasn't very nice to Barack Obama. To say the least. But there are NO POLITICAL POSTS ON BARKING CARNIVAL, right?
18

Cedric Benson gets arrested. Again.

Posted by HenryJames on June 7th, 2008 under

Sigh. This time he was arrested in Austin's warehouse district for drunken driving after he was pulled over for a traffic violation. According to Austin police spokeswoman Veneza Aguinaga, whose name you have to be sober to even attempt to pronounce, he refused a breathalyzer and blood test. That's actually pretty smart. Not Cedric Benson Is there an NFL version of the Fulmer Cup?
17

The Official “Stevie Wonder Sucks” Post

Posted by EyesOfTX on May 6th, 2008 under

I was fortunate enough to have attended New Orleans' Jazzfest over the weekend, and my brain cells have finally regenerated to the point where I'm able to write about it. Three nights at the Old Absinthe House and two mornings of bloody marys at the Chartre House will have that effect on a person. BTW, the Olde Absinthe House is the greatest bar in the world. I'm convinced of this and am not
11

Cedric Benson forgets that black people can’t swim

Posted by HenryJames on May 5th, 2008 under Football

Former Texas running back Cedric Benson got himself arrested on Lake Travis last Saturday. He was charged with operating a boat while intoxicated and resisting arrest. An LCRA officer performing a routine safety inspection found an intoxicated Benson driving the boat and not wearing a life jacket. Dumb. Looks drunk to me. The arresting officer reported that Benson "failed a vision test, had slurred speech, did not complete the finger count test —
3

Ryan Perrilloux refused service at whites only restaurant

Posted by HenryJames on April 2nd, 2008 under

At least that's probably how he'll remember it anyway. Beleaguered LSU quarterback Ryan Perrilloux got into yet another incident involving a public display of ignorance. Perrilloux entered the Kona Grill about 30 minutes after it closed. This being Louisiana I assume it closed at like 4am. Anyway, Perrilloux went to the bar and tried to order his usual gin and grape soda along with some pizza shooters, shrimp poppers or extreme fajitas. When told that
11

The Babelfish Recruiting Translator

Posted by Scipio Tex on February 21st, 2008 under Football

I typed in lines from some recruiting interviews and it gave me some useful insights. Thought I would share. Translation in italics. For me, it's all about getting a good education. Seminole. Bank on it. I want to major in finance or petroleum engineering. sociology, holla! I value a family environment. I'm going to fuck some white girls. I really liked the atmopshere there.
18

Is Ryan Perrilloux gonna have to choke a bitch?

Posted by HenryJames on February 19th, 2008 under

What does he have to do to get kicked off the LSU football team for good? He's just been suspended indefinitely for the third time since May by head coach Les Miles. The Times-Picayune's sources say Perrilloux missed classes, team workouts and at least one team meeting. Jackass trifecta in play! Perrilloux is said to have also violated a private agreement he reached with Miles sometime last year. Perrilloux's only defense? Ryan Perrilloux, this is