Football Articles
Texas-Alabama: Faith, Defense, and Phlogiston
Posted by Scipio Tex on January 6th, 2010 under Football
I haven’t been writing much because I’ve been slammed with work, recharging my battery while visiting family and friends in Austin, gaining so much sodium bloating from festive seasonal eating that my now fattened sausage fingers can’t manipulate a keyboard without pressing three keys at a time, I’ve been intensely focused on the new season of the Bachelor and…well, OK, the real reason: I’m not very enthused about what I’m about to write for you.
Let me be blunt: we’re underdogs for good reason.
That doesn’t mean we can’t win. We absolutely can. That doesn’t mean there’s no chance I won’t (I love double negatives) leave the Rose Bowl around 8:30 PST Thursday evening seized with pure joy and begin a maniacal reign of drunken terror on Alabama fans, any LA guy I see wearing skinny jeans, an array of LAPD mounted policeman with whatever easily lobbed foods that I can purchase at Panda Express, the Kardashians, and the drive-thru of an In N Out Burger around 3:00 am. But I am telling you it is moderately improbable. If you’re the quantitative type, I’m putting our odds at 36.5%. If you’re the qualitative type, I’ll say “sorta shitty.”
If you’re neither, I want to know something: just what are you?
I’ve looked at the match-up from every angle (including Funhouse mirrors, where, interestingly, Terrence Cody actually resembles a young Denzel Washington instead of the obese corn rowed girl I knew in 8th grade that beat up our starting QB with a can of hair spray wielded like Ray Liotta’s pistol whipping in Goodfellas). Unlike my wild optimism headed into the USC game in ‘06 – still the greatest sporting event I’ve ever attended and the greatest college football game ever played – I leave for Los Angeles tomorrow for my third Rose Bowl with the hope that faith and defense are enough to win a national championship. Given my agnosticism, that leaves me with defense. But if Will Muschamp comes through, I’ll reconsider the agnosticism.
There have been many reasons advanced by Longhorn faithful as to why we win and I’d like to examine the main ones. Interestingly, when one leaves the rock solid logical realm of our defense or kick returns, they are almost all focused on intangibles. Most are completely embarrassing and often vaguely Aggie-like.
Intangibles are great. Intangibles are fun. Intangibles are also…NOT TANGIBLE. You can’t see them, touch them, or even adequately explain them. Like phlogiston, Bob Stoops’ chin, horoscopes, Asgard, chupacabras, chemistryness, German humor, my sense of decorum in Las Vegas, clutchitude, and Nessie.
Let me break it down for you in another way: grown men who work a paper route, are impotent, wear Jacksonville Jaguar starter jerseys, and resemble one of the fat moped twins from the Guinness Book of World Records often hope that women will come to appreciate their many intangibles. When Michael Spinks fought Mike Tyson, he had intangibles like a motherfucker, I can assure you.
So here are the best I’ve stumbled across on the internets:
Alabama blew their load against Florida; that was their Super Bowl.
Great point. If I get with Penelope Cruz on December 5th, I couldn’t imagine summoning the mental and physical energy to make the two-humped beast with Petra Nemcova one month later. For the National Championship. Really, I just can’t see Alabama’s motivation here at all. I mean, ours is clear – a National Championship. But their payoff in all of this is just so opaque. What’s in it for Bama? Spell it out for me! Why would they even show up? Some of you will be mystified when the NFC Championship game winner decides to play hard in the Super Bowl.
Colt Lost The Heisman to a Bama RB, Vince Lost The Heisman to a USC RB. Now he’s mad! Watch out Bama!
And Kennedy’s secretary was named Johnson!
This is a glimpse into a child’s world of cause and effect. This is only slightly less absurd than the OL version of this assertion (Our OL lost Colt the Heisman, now they’re mad!) or the OC version (Greg Davis lost Colt the Heisman, he vows to eat more Activia!)
Listen, Vince Young was going to lay waste to USC whether he’d won the Heisman in a landslide, was runner-up in Ms. Teen Black America, or won the Publisher’s Clearinghouse Sweepstakes. VY humiliates foes on big stages. He is VY. That is his programming. And if Colt had Blalock, Sendlein, Scott, Allen, Studdard blocking for him this year with David Thomas to throw to as well, he would handle Bama’s D too. Let me suggest that petty motivations will lose their value around the same time we hit James Kirkendoll for -2 on our opening play.
Muschamp and Applewhite worked for Saban. They know his secrets!
And he knows theirs. Saban taught Muschamp all he knows and he oppressed Applewhite like he was Poland and Saban was Stalin. Tuscaloosa was Applewhite’s Katyn Forest. Listen, coaches watch film in preparing for this stuff. For like a month. Really. There’s no advantage here beyond the inherent capacity of what each staff brings to the contest. Muschamp? – I feel good. Saban? – he’ll do his job very well. Offenses? Hmmm. So let’s talk about that…
Alabama had 10 days to prepare for the SEC title game and brought an uncharacteristic play-action game on 1st down with McElroy firing the rock like he was back at Southlake, a half dozen creative new wrinkles in the passing game (mostly involving the TE and RB), and lots of polished badassedness. Greg Davis had ten days to ready himself for the Big 12 title game and he spent that time focusing on his whist league; reasoning that any player whose name he couldn’t pronounce must not be worth a shit and didn’t need a double team. On a side note, if we’d ever faced Nnamdi Asomugha at Cal, we would have had five pick 6s in the first half. Bottom line: fear West Africans. And East Africans, if we’re talking Idi Amin.
Nick Saban will have his team wound tighter than our road whites. We’ll be loosey goosey and put whoopee cushions under Cleve Bryant’s hemorrhoid doughnut!
OK, here’s an intangible I can possibly buy. Saban is a good big game coach, but he’s wound tight. He shits rabbit pellets and grinds his teeth. He speaks Spanish using usted and his family beagle is named EXECUTE! Dude once called Donny Osmond a hippie. He might just psyche his team out and have McElroy so worried about managing the game without turnovers that Greg’s first throw will sail end-over-end like a aborigine chucking a boomerang at a wallaby. McElroy then crumbles to the ground and sobs like Ann Heche and Sergio Kindle clubs him to death with an Alabama cheerleader.
By the way, how have we handled big game pressure this year? Nebraska. Clock management. Offensive abortion. Oh. How about another neutral site game – OU! Colt’s best play was a tackle on a pick 6. Apparently our intangibles are so intangible that it magnifies their very intangibility. Advantage: Texas!
We own the Rose Bowl!
No. We do not. It is owned by a consortium of Saudi princes and the Rothschilds. Every ninth Bastille Day, they force Madeline Albright to sacrifice a sickly Mormon child on the 50 yard line with a riding mower to cement their unholy bond and guarantee them reservations at Spago. Look – I love the Rose Bowl. It’s the best place to watch football on the planet. Our two wins there are the finest games I’ve ever attended as a Longhorn fan. Those teams are gone. You-know-who is now mindfucking Jeff Fisher for a living now.
I’m guessing the two teams on the field will have more to say about outcome than our aura, vibe, history, or our unparalleled ability to perform athletics in 67 degree weather. Apparently, we are the only team in America that can handle pleasing levels of barometric pressure. As for history, if you think time will wrinkle Hawking-style and spit out Vince Young running for a 80 yard touchdown, I hope he isn’t followed by a tyrannosaurus freed from the epochal confines of the La Brea tar pits. Actually, I do. Because that would be fantastic.
Please let there be an ankylosaurus too!
Bama is overconfident! We’re the underdog. Look at ________ (fill in blank with improbable victor in contest from Bible, Rocky film, previous bowl game, Survivor cast member, Liza Minelli)
I never underestimate the psychological power of being an underdog or the appeal of Scientology to people with low IQs. Like strip mining, it can move mountains. Years ago, many said Barking Carnival could never become a mediocre sports blog full of snark, but look at us now. Please consider that the dodo bird was a bit of an underdog too.
Say what you want, but give Greg Davis a month to prepare and…
And what? What do you get? A tax-free conversion from your 401K to a Roth IRA? A safer Papau New Guinea? Braces? A deeper appreciation of the meaning of Kwanzaa? An end to the Maoist insurgency in Nepal? A sudden interest in joining a ham radio club? A Rin Tin Tin decoder ring?
We played two big boy defenses this year. Against them, we went 7 for 35 on third down, averaged 236 yards per game, put up 13 and 16 points, respectively (and the defense helped quite a bit with that), and turned it over six times combined. We’d worked on OU since the summer and had almost two weeks for Nebraska. Will we see a nice little wrinkle or two? For sure. Will it outweigh our hardwired schematic weaknesses and lazy approach -”we’re gonna do what we do?” C’mon admit it. You know in some deep part of your soul that we will line up in the I backed up on our goalline and reach block Cody. If we lose the game 2-0, I will hurl defecant at our offensive coaches as they leave Pasadena. Not my own though.
Alabama’s D is different from Nebraska. They can’t do what Nebraska did to us. Blah blah blah…more words
Yes they are different. Hakeem Olujawon was different from Larry Bird. Both could destroy you. They can too. Oklahoma wasn’t Nebraska either. The personnel and individual strengths can change, the problem remains the same: when an opposing defense of a certain overall quality plays us, we get savaged.
It’s a simple numbers game. If they have enough talent and coaching to whip our running game with even or even less-than-even numbers, they can put 7 in coverage on our 4 wides. Or, if our TE is in the game, 6 on 3. Over time, they win that matchup on most snaps.
Suh was a cheetah-rhino hybrid; Cody is a cholesterol-ridden mastodon.
I don’t think Cody will have a huge game impact if we coach at any level above junior high. However, you’re buying into the false media hype that Cody is the key piece on their defense. He’s not. Worry about Marcel Darius if you want to focus on a DL. He’s legit as a pass rusher. And you might ponder the zone blitzes where Alabama creates an illusion of pressure with four – three overloaded on one side – and then has our quick routes jumped. We’re suckers for it.
So now that we’ve battered around the mystics a bit, how can we win?
Offense
I’ll skip the obvious platitudes like “Colt needs to play well.” That written, Colt needs to play well. Three picks won’t get it done, no matter how many 3rd and 12s we put him in.
Manufacture a running game.
Something. Anything. Or do things that mimic its value: shovels, boots, RB screens…
Ha. That was funny. I wrote RB screen and almost believed it. We time the RB screen game as well as a Klan convention at a NBA All-Star weekend. But I can dream.
Or maybe we’ll install the ultra-nifty Dallas Cowboy inside lead delay draw. And maybe we’ll also sneak Andre Gurode and Leonard Davis in to block it for us. We need Colt to be involved, obviously. Whether it’s zone read, running QB lead draws, encouraging run-pass option boots, or, imagine, just running real goddamn running plays without asking everyone to reach block. We have to do enough to force some sort of honesty.
Up tempo.
The soundtrack of our offense needs to be Prodigy, not Streisand. Alabama has legitimate struggles with fast pace O (is it their size? how they signal plays? dunno – cannot figure out) and they can’t keep Cody on the field if you go no-huddle fast tempo. We’ll need to do more than just run an inside zone play over and over, our idiot’s version of a hurry-up. We need actual offense, with multiple different plays – running/passing – each building off of the other. Then run it without stopping. At halftime, put in some more. This is our best chance on offense by far and our best hope to achieve a Where Did That Come From? performance. Fingers crossed.
Get them in man, iso a safety
If Bama can flood the field with DBs or play their LBs eight yards from the LOS with impunity, we’re sunk. Extra DBs will allow them to play man-under with their corners and keep their big safeties free of specific coverage responsibility, allowing them to ballhawk and thump. That will end very badly for us. If, however, we can force some man coverage and run the ball just respectably enough to get Bama to keep honest personnel on the field, we’ve got a real shot if we can get Malcolm Williams or Shipley running with a 215 pounder deep. Mind you, Bama’s safeties are good bigs – but they don’t have the hips to run with our best on a double move. Our best shot at a big play TD. See, aren’t I being positive now?
Defense
I feel good here overall, but the Tide do present some challenges that are unique given that our offense and scout teams cannot in any way mimic what it feels like to go against a downhill running team with physical OL with real athletic ability, three good to excellent backs, and a big TE. If you say Oklahoma State, I will rebuke you. Different league, hoss. My concerns are:
Play Their Screen Game
We’ve got to get a handle on this. We’re not great against the RB screen (see OU game, among others) and much of that is because we don’t get to see them in practice run effectively. Ingram broke Florida’s back with his 69 yard reception and it’s a hugely underrated part of his game. I fear this as a backbreaker in a 14-10 tight game late.
Peek and Maze
I’m not particularly fearful of Julio Jones, unless it’s competing in a spelling bee. He runs poor routes. The main thing is just respecting his straight line speed and tackling well, as he is huge. By the way, if he weighs 210, then Saban is 6 foot 3. 230+, easy.
Maze is nifty, he can get deep on you, and he can do things after the catch. There are times where we’re going to have him on an island to overload the run and we’re going to need exemplary coverage. I expect Alabama to take their shots with Marquis.
Peek is a good TE and he’s huge; like Maze, his numbers don’t accurately represent his potential. Reminds me a lot of David Boss from the NY Giants. He might only have three catches but I’ll be willing to bet that if he does, they’ll all be third down conversions or red zone back breakers. They have to like him matched on Gideon. The nice limiting factor on Peek is that Bama isn’t wild about their pass protection at RT. So if Acho can wreak a little havoc, the Tide may have to leash Peek.
Adjustment Time
We can’t simulate what Bama looks like on offense. People equate physical with big, but Bama’s OL is physical because of their athleticism and motor. They’re really well-coached and they love to trap, pull, move; some things that we just don’t see. Ingram is the perfect back for them and Richardson and Upchurch are big time change-ups. I worry about the potential for a slow start as we take time to adjust – see Beanie Wells, Fiesta Bowl.
Special Teams
Pretty simple: if we have a net plus here (good kick coverage, a big kick or punt return), our chances of winning go even money or better. If we have a net loss (bad coverage and/or allow Arenas to hurt us), I see our chances as slim and none with none leaving town soon.
I’ll reread this essay tomorrow morning with total contempt as I psyche myself up that we will in fact win by 30, but this is my current no-shit assessment. My sincere hope is that I can log on early Friday morning and eat a big bag of crow for my moderate pessimism. Until then, I think Bama is a legitimate favorite. For tangible reasons.
Hook ‘em.
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Jordan Hamilton + 2 years ~ Wesley Johnson. Discuss.
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” a heavily tattooed lycanthrope Irish wookie named Lucas O’Rear”
That is just strong command of the English language.
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gotta,
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And yes, it appears JoPo wrote pretty much the same thing. It’s hard to believe with all the national talking heads, fans, and everyone in between saying otherwise, but I think it’s the only conclusion to draw for anyone that really watched this team.
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Patrick,
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Patrick,
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Prophylactic said:
January 6th, 2010 at 5:11 am
Fuck it, we got intangibles and we’re gonna win this shit.
Looney said:
January 6th, 2010 at 5:15 am
Great writeup as usual, Scip. I could not agree more on the assessment that this game goes even money with a big special teams play (or defensive score). Most predictions I’ve seen on the interwebs have us losing by 4 or 5. Here’s to extending our non-offensive scoring streak this season and winning it 20-17.
Hook ‘em!
NBMisha said:
January 6th, 2010 at 5:17 am
Yea, sanity. Can’t say much for it, as a life strategy.
Thank Zorastra I’m off Friday. If we lose I’ll get even more plowed than if we win.
beowulf said:
January 6th, 2010 at 5:28 am
Actually, I’m optimistic that we win tomorrow night because we have more talent across the board, a much better seasoned QB with a shot at leaving a legacy that is unparalled at Texas, a defense and DC that is every bit the equal of the Tide’s, a coaching staff that has a proven record of success in these situations, and a head coach that will have his team better prepared (history tells us this) and in a better mindset for the game.
You are far too pessimistic for whatever reasons. But you are one fun fella to read when you come out firing like you did.
BTW. Coaches and players always refer to “intangibles” as primary reasons they either won or lost a game. Attitude is a huge factor in these games involving fairly equal teams. Personally, I can’t fathom walking out of the Rose Bowl tomorrow night without another National Championship.
Hope we run into you.
Fritz said:
January 6th, 2010 at 5:29 am
German humor is not tangible?
I don’t get it.
I’m hanging my hopes on our defense, and the fact that bowl games have tons of upsets. If we had played a week after the championship games, I wouldn’t give us much chance at all. After a long layoff? Well, that adds a lot of randomness into it. At times like this I wish I wasn’t an atheist…
Huckleberry said:
January 6th, 2010 at 5:39 am
You forgot to account for the three interceptions, special teams return TD, and two fumble recoveries.
And we’re in our road whites, too.
Texas 41
Alabama 0
TKO said:
January 6th, 2010 at 5:49 am
Great, I was feeling reasonably confident about the game and here you go being all realistic and shit.
Kidding aside, this was one of your better efforts and it was genuinely funny throughout. Cheers.
ransomstoddard said:
January 6th, 2010 at 5:51 am
You left out the 132 pound kickoff specialist who kicks line drives to the other team’s 20 yard line, our Pop Warner kickoff coverage, and bizarre punt strategy. Those factors alone give UA ten points. Best to have very low expectations for this game and appreciate the fact that we are playing for it all. We’ll have another opportunity in about three years.
parlin said:
January 6th, 2010 at 5:55 am
Salt consumption has made you morose and gloomy.
Will gets us scoreless into a third OT. Chris Hall
rumbles into the endzone on a fumblerooski, spikes
the ball, and decks an Alabama cheerleader out of
sheer meanness.
I dreamed it in my head.
beowulf said:
January 6th, 2010 at 6:36 am
BTW. The same dynamics are in play with these two teams that caused you to hope for an Alabama win over Florida back in the day before you became vaginalized after the SEC and Big 12 CGs.
Can McElroy have another masterpiece game or will he revert to his Auburn/Tennessee/etc. bus driver comfort zone? Can Will make the Bama QB win the game by shutting down Bama’s run game?
Will Colt find his sea legs and get us a run game against Bama? Do our receivers fare well against Bama’s run stuffing safeties? Have we been successful picking up blitzes during the year? (yes)
I like our chances.
jinx said:
January 6th, 2010 at 6:43 am
I had an actual dream that we lost 4-0. That’s right, two safties. Fuck greg davis and his son chris hall. (Also hoping that I have to eat crow on that last comment, but not expecting too.)
Thanks for the optimism Scipio. At least it makes me feel better that this economy has screwed me out of the chance to go to the game.
TaylorTRoom said:
January 6th, 2010 at 6:44 am
36.5% chance? That’s about right, in my opinion. Alabama looks to be a little better. Texas is not 2005 Texas, but Bama is not 2005 USC either, believe it or not.
I agree on the intangibles. Often, they’re not tangible because there really isn’t anything there.
Look, for the last two years, the story on this Texas team has been the same- it will go as far as Colt and the defense take it. Colt played poorly against OU and NU, and we won by only 3 and 2 respectively (per Sagarin’s Predictor, we should have won those games by…4 and 7 points, respectively). Colt’s timingand accuracy were off in both of those games, and if he only played average ball (or if Kirkendoll holds on in the B12 CG), we would be looking at this team much differently.
Can Colt play like he did against OU in 2008? Like he did against Missouri in ‘08 and ‘09? Like the 2nd half of the Fiesta Bowl last year? or this year’s OSU game? If so, I think we probably win. Colt’s 2008 RRS was the finest performance I had ever seen from him, where his accuracy, timing and decisions were all near flawless. Let’s hope we see that again.
Monahorns said:
January 6th, 2010 at 6:54 am
My question is why the change in tone Scipio? Before the CCGs, you were saying we matched up much better with Alabama? I agree with your points though. There is much to be afraid of.
ghostofagroundgame said:
January 6th, 2010 at 6:56 am
I wish I didn’t so fervently agree with your conclusions. Try as I might, I’ve been struggling all week to stay positive about the game. Everything is made worse by the fact that Bama is coming off of its best game of the year and we are coming off 2 of our worst. Anyway, thanks for making concrete some of the inchoate fears kicking around in my brain. Good piece, as usual.
Camus said:
January 6th, 2010 at 6:58 am
Good post.
The only thing I would take issue with is the tightness argument – Texas was favored vs. both a hobbled/diminished OU and a Nebraska team that is still trying to get its offensive playbook back from Scott Frost, anything short of a victory in either of those games would be regarded (rightfully) as the greatest failboat since the Titanic, so the nervousness and bedwetting in those games was a bit less inexplicable.
At this point, I actually consider this season as a success, the minimum standards (big 12 champs, BCS bowl appearance) have been met and anything on top is gravy. A loss to Alabama doesn’t seem as if it would be completely unacceptable unless it unfolds in OU vs. USC style of sheer embarrassment. it seems as if the players feel the same way, judging from the orgiastic joy with which they approached Space Mountain.
beowulf said:
January 6th, 2010 at 7:02 am
TTR is one of my favorite posters here and elsewhere. Having said that, stating that there is 36.5% chance of Texas winning this game is far sillier and baseless than trying to find “intangibles” in the Horns’ favor. I mean really.
Really? 36.5%?”>)
Bob in Houston said:
January 6th, 2010 at 7:05 am
Without all the detail, this was how I was looking at the game. The right team is favored. Invoking James Brown (the QB), it’s much easier to foresee Alabama winning 31-14 than Texas by the same score.
I can’t help but be pessimistic about the offense. GD is going to do what he does, and, unless Colt is channeling VY, that will get us what it usually gets us against good teams.
And if they start the game with that wide receiver screen with no blockers, I’ll probably go watch the college basketball doubleheader on CBS College Sports.
TaylorTRoom said:
January 6th, 2010 at 7:13 am
‘wulf, 4 point dogs win the game outright about 35% of the time. “>)
Of course, that’s assuming the line doesn’t have some irrational bias in it. In 2005, USC was favored by 7 over Texas, but I think Huck will tell you the line should have been much smaller. Is this line irrational? Are people making too much of the recent games (Bama’s great showing and our near fiasco)? Maybe.
One reason for optimism is that the 30+ day break between this game and the last game tends to destroy teams’ momentum, for the good or the bad. Is that an intangible?
Magnificent Bastard said:
January 6th, 2010 at 7:16 am
Idi Amin is My Yard Man
Levander Williams said:
January 6th, 2010 at 7:28 am
Well, it’s about damned time. Welcome back.
I have much of the same impressions; not in as much depth, but in general the success of Texas will hinge on whether our OL can do a credible job in pass protection, and whether we can (will) do anything to keep Alabama’s defense honest and a little off-balance. Boom will be fine, assuming that his guys aren’t on the field for 40 minutes and just get worn out.
“Whether it’s zone read, running QB lead draws, encouraging run-pass option boots, or, imagine, just running real goddamn running plays without asking everyone to reach block.”
Ha ha ha ha! Ha ha ha ha!
Here’s to hoping for a moment of clarity from Greg tomorrow evening.
nordberg said:
January 6th, 2010 at 7:29 am
Great write-up Scip! Now if you’ll excuse me I’m going to go shoot myself in the face.
Hiphopotamus said:
January 6th, 2010 at 7:33 am
This was good and all, but I don’t know how any of you could feel adequately prepared for a national title game without a pep talk from Clipper Cooper.
lazer2280 said:
January 6th, 2010 at 7:35 am
Pretty much agree with your thoughts. I’m not sure we will ever fully understand what a solid tight end would have meant to this offense.
ghostofagroundgame said:
January 6th, 2010 at 7:39 am
Mike Piazza believes in a solid tight end.
M-U-D-H-O-L-E!!!! C’mon CTJ. We need one for reals.
nordberg said:
January 6th, 2010 at 7:40 am
I’m not sure I’ll ever understand how we can have like nine TE’s on the roster and none can even be considered “solid”.
brucebond said:
January 6th, 2010 at 7:46 am
doooooooooomed
BatesHorn said:
January 6th, 2010 at 7:47 am
excellent work, man.
I’m sliding up and down the stages of grief. Yesterday I fell back into denial. Today I’m bargaining. I have moments of Acceptance and Hope, but they are fleeting. They whole thing is very frustrating, because unlike in 2005, I’m accutely aware that this game will not only rely on the players on the field, but also Greg Davis, who is just inconsistent enough to pull something special out of his pants, but is more likely to leave us feeling like HenryJames girlfriend.
R. Triltsch said:
January 6th, 2010 at 7:47 am
German humor is not tangible?
Someone needs to reread Mein Kamph. It’s a knee slapper..
Tubin said:
January 6th, 2010 at 7:49 am
Reverse mudhole? Genius!
beowulf said:
January 6th, 2010 at 7:51 am
TTR. 3 out of the last 4 ‘dogs in the CG have won the title. Texas has a 75% chance of winning tomorrow.
mockingbird said:
January 6th, 2010 at 8:07 am
Call it an intangible or call it what ever you want — but this is a game of 19 and 20 year olds.
Bama’s players are at an age range deficient of life’s maturity and perspective. These guys have listened for a solid month that this game is a mere formality and a coronation. After all, they are part of the greatest conference to ever squeeze a football.
Frame of mind or lack of focus aren’t variables to brush-off like lint in a game like football (or really any sport). If Bama comes out overwhelmed by the moment or believes they are superhuman (as 19 year boys often do), then the first quarter could define the game. See Utah 2008, OU vs. BSU 2006, Florida vs. Mich 2007.
The erratic nature of college sports is what makes it so entertaining.
ransomstoddard said:
January 6th, 2010 at 8:10 am
Bad news on the OL front. AAS reports today that McWhorter is NOT retiring after this year, saying in effect: “Why would I retire? I’ve got nothing else to do.”
We all know that Greg Davis is worthless without a Heisman Trophy candidate at qb, a Bilitnekoff Award winner at wr, and an All-American tight end. Since it has become obvious that Buckner is mediocre at best [6 catches in the last 3 games], the offense has totally bogged down and will not likely be any better tomorrow.
Cincohorn said:
January 6th, 2010 at 8:14 am
The world has not seen this much crap compiled in one place since the Big Stink.
Mack Brown said:
January 6th, 2010 at 8:15 am
Mac, I don’t think you understand… you ARE retiring after this year. Get it?
texastough said:
January 6th, 2010 at 8:16 am
I like mudholes better
LoneOptimist said:
January 6th, 2010 at 8:17 am
I am more optimistic about our Special Teams Coverage. I’m sure we use Scott and I bet see a big change for the better.
LoneOptimist said:
January 6th, 2010 at 8:21 am
Then again…
“Coach [Brown] says he wants to rotate guys a lot to keep people fresh. More than in most games,” said Chiles, who has 34 catches this season. “So I hope to make the most out of my chances.”
Yeah!!
OldTimeHorn said:
January 6th, 2010 at 8:24 am
I’m not neither. I’m intuitive, and my intuition tells me you get those Bama boys outta the South and the resulting dumbstruckness crimps their style.
(Tha’s a true double neg, btw. Negating a negative state don’t qualify.)
Bartoncreek said:
January 6th, 2010 at 8:30 am
Damn. That is pretty much how I feel.
The one thing that I am holding onto that I want to believe is tangible: 82% of the money bet on the game thus far is on Alabama. That is a big disparity. And in case you haven’t noticed, the people taking those bets are a lot better at what they do than the people placing the bets.
That is all I got. What is more tangible than cash?
Cincohorn said:
January 6th, 2010 at 8:33 am
OldTime has a point. McClain did stay his ass in his hotel room with a bad case of the stupid yesterday.
uthookem said:
January 6th, 2010 at 8:36 am
Fuck it. I was really happy leading up to this and thought we would win by 10. I still think that is possible, but I could see us just as easily shitting the bed and losing. I would really not be surprised by any outcome in this game.
That said, we have had an immensely successful season, and won the conference title, which is the goal from spring practice. As someone else said above, anything else is gravy.
Oh, and I’m still believing the “blew their wad” argument, and the “Saban will have his team too tight” argument. If we play well on ST, we win by 10.
Whew, looks like I’m making it full circle!
uthookem said:
January 6th, 2010 at 8:38 am
Hey Barton, where does the 82% number come from? Shouldn’t they have altered the line?
ghostofagroundgame said:
January 6th, 2010 at 8:41 am
Ca$h money. Thanks Bartoncreek, I actually feel a little better. That almost cancels out the thought of Kirkendoll and Chiles starting at WR. And I betcha that they do too.
We can win this game. No doubt. We can come out and have Malc run a double-move on the outside on our first play, with a fake bubble screen to the other side of the field. Colt can come out totally dialed in and hit 90% of his passes. We can start to run Shipley on routes where the inevitable double team on him immediately opens up Goodwin in space (I’m thinking short crossing routes, 5 yards and X, kind of a Tech-type thing — we need Goodwin, because this is a YAC kind of thing). We can throw 5 -7 screen passes to Tre Newton out of spread sets when Bama blitzes and is in zone coverage, provided that we get some second level blocking from our receivers. We can also come out with Greg Smith/Cody Johnson at blocking fullback and run some legitimate two-back sets, then use that for a little play-action. We can hit 50% of our passes over 20 yards, mostly to Malc. Some combination of these things gets us a win.
Similarly, we can corner blitz McElroy in the first series and make him gently retarded for the rest of the game. Bama is not going to run too, too many sets which expose our safety deficiency (and thinness at cornerback), which is going to be good for us. We need our defense to step it up and we need at least three turnovers.
So, shit, we can totally win this game. We just need to play our best game of the season, And if you can’t do that for the national championship then you don’t deserve to be national champion. That’s it fellas.
WhoooTex said:
January 6th, 2010 at 8:43 am
Never a good sign when I haven’t even made it through the post’s title and I’ve already encountered a word I don’t understand.
stuckinmn said:
January 6th, 2010 at 8:49 am
In 2006 I grew more and more confident as we neared game time, such that I was genuinely expecting a 2-3 touchdown beatdown of USC. In 2010, I’m becoming more and more pessimistic as kickoff nears. Something about not having a being from another planet at QB that can overcome shitty playcalls.
nordberg said:
January 6th, 2010 at 8:54 am
“Hey Barton, where does the 82% number come from? Shouldn’t they have altered the line?”
A week ago it was Bama -5. Now it’s -3.5. If all the money is going on Bama, shouldn’t that line be going the other way?
kafka said:
January 6th, 2010 at 8:57 am
I’m a bit more optimistic.
The blueprint for UT on D is pretty clear: take away the run and force Bama to throw the ball. Intercept some of those passes. There is a decent chance that could happen.
On O, Mack/GD had to be shocked out of thier complacency by the Huskers (9 sacks!). You have to hope that Major and Will get invoved in the O game planning. Bama is not used to defending the passing spread attack (the SEC and Bama being more run oriented) so that works to UT’s advantage.
Muschamp will make Mack/GD realize that this game will be a defensive struggle: the key things for the O is to not turn the ball over, make some first downs, and recognize its limitations. The horns are not going to magically start running well (or even OK) vs Bama. The OL is not going to block well enough for many deep or even intermediate passes. The horns O will live or die on their short passing attack.
UT knows how Bama will defend: contempt for the UT run, pressure on the WRs, zone blitz Colt, and probably a couple safeties deep. Very quick crossing patterns (ala Leach) will be effective.
Rolling Colt out renders Mount Cody useless (no need to even block him) and buys some time for longer passes. Since Colt throws well on the run, roll him out a bunch.
Put one of the WRs in moton so it is hard to jam him.
I’d go 4 wide most of the time. The UT OL probably does not block the Bama DL well even with a TE so what’s the point? Make sure that one of the WRs on each side is an effective blocker for those WR screens. Might consider playing Cody at WR: throw him short passes to get him isolated on a DB and get more effective blocking at WR. Cobb might be a good guy to put at WR: he can catch the ball and blocks very well.
Alternatively, UT could add a FB or H back to help in blitz pickup (rather than a TE). Cody at FB should be good at blitz pickup and will much more of an offensive threat than Greg Smith at TE.
Run a lot more screens than usual so the UT OL can block LBs and DBs instead of DL.
Christian Scott is back for this game, that will help (especially on special teams).
spider said:
January 6th, 2010 at 8:57 am
German humor:
child: mommy, there are some men singing outside the door
mom: well, give them some money and maybe they’ll go away
child: but one of them is daddy
OK, so that wasn’t in German, but that’s a German joke. Twenty years later, I still don’t get it.
Cincohorn said:
January 6th, 2010 at 9:02 am
That’s OK Whooo. Scipio is obviously feeling a little dephlogisticated in his belly after the holidays. This can be caused by excessive intake of bacon or ESPN coverage.
HenryJames said:
January 6th, 2010 at 9:09 am
Scipio is a vegan so it must have been ESPN.
Pat Sajak said:
January 6th, 2010 at 9:11 am
When going into a big game for my team, I always first start by asking myself how much a win is worth to me, in dollars. A NC win is probably worth about $2500 to me (my wheel of fortune gig not paying as much as you think). thus, I bet $2500 on my team to lose. So win or lose, I win.
LoneOptimist said:
January 6th, 2010 at 9:13 am
Don’t you just end up even?
Kosciuszko said:
January 6th, 2010 at 9:15 am
You must be right because your Poland analogies are spot on. I should know.
I do, however, put more faith in intangibles and team chemistry than you do. I’m just not sure they favor us in this game. Bama’s team chemistry and intangibles looked pretty great against Florida. Our defense’s did against Nebraska.
It seems pretty clear that there is a serious loss of faith between Colt and the O-line that is effecting everything from his decision making to his throwing mechanics.
Historically, teams that have looked great in their conference championship games have done well in the MNC game. Teams that have not, or did not play a conference championship game, not so much.
magnusbleuveigner said:
January 6th, 2010 at 9:16 am
This game is obviously 50/50. Either we win or we don’t.
I’m going to stick with our BCS trend. We win in the last minute. If it comes down to another 45 yarder, I hope we’re kicking it, because Tiffin is one of only a few better than Lawrence.
Was that a Beck’s commercial a few years back? “I just flew in from Hamburg, and boy are my ahms tired. Zank you, I be heyah all za week.”
Oh, and I will be seeing Asgard one day. All in due time.
fswood21 said:
January 6th, 2010 at 9:22 am
Over under on number of stories about Alabama being the greatest football team ever if they win?
emmett fitzhume said:
January 6th, 2010 at 9:25 am
While I agree with most everything in the post, I hope to hell the team is thinking about it differently.
Rationality leads me to expect a loss, but I was also expecting one in 2008 against OU. Special teams will make or break us, as they did in that game.
Intangibles do matter in sports (though many “intangibles” are rather easily quantified), and anything we can do to get or keep the initiative momentum-wise could very well win this game for us. If we are constantly behind the chains, going three-and-out, etc., it will be too late before we know it.
Here’s to McElroy channeling his inner Zac Lee, and all the plays that Greg Davis has been saving all year for this game!
Nick Saban said:
January 6th, 2010 at 9:26 am
I’m going to pass Mack and Greg in my stool.
Magnificent Bastard said:
January 6th, 2010 at 9:27 am
Regarding faith: the Fellowship of Christian Athletes just awarded Colt the Bobby Bowden Award honoring the FBS student-athlete who conducts himself as a faith model in the community, in the classroom and on the field. So now we just have to figure out how phlogiston works in our favor.
magnusbleuveigner said:
January 6th, 2010 at 9:33 am
Bobby Bowden just lost 14 wins for very un-Christian like practices. Old people get a pass don’t they?
texoz said:
January 6th, 2010 at 9:34 am
Intangibles are what brought down the Titanic and the Hindenburg and they will bring down Bama.
Cincohorn said:
January 6th, 2010 at 9:34 am
“Historically, teams that have looked great in their conference championship games have done well in the MNC game. Teams that have not, or did not play a conference championship game, not so much.”
Excluding of course 4 of the past 5 years:
2008 OU wins B12CCG 62-21 and then gets trounced by the Gators
2007 Eventual champ LSU needs late touchdown to beat mediocre Tennessee in SEC CGG
2006 UF plays worst game of year against Dick then dicks OSU
2004 A CCG free USC beats up OU despite 42-3 Big 12 buffalo butt rape
A.Deal.O. said:
January 6th, 2010 at 9:41 am
Where’s there’s a *Will*, there’s a way, and I’m sticking to that quip.
Fantastic article as always, Scip!
Bartoncreek said:
January 6th, 2010 at 9:41 am
82% is a composite number of the biggest online sports books current wager total on the game. It is an accurate sample size.
I am not sure I want to get into all of the details of line movement here. But, it doesn’t work quite like the public thinks it does. The line has been holding between 3.5 and 4 despite the heavy public action on Bama. The reason they have not moved it up to capture more Texas bettors (or less Bama bettors) is likely because there are a number of big professionals that are willing to hammer Texas at 4.5 and higher. The books will take their chances, so far, going against the public and avoiding “the sharks” big money.
That could change if the money keeps flowing in on Bama or if the sharks won’t bite at 3.5 and they need to even out their bets to some extent. But, make no mistake, the line isn’t always set or moved to a number where the books can capture 50% of the wagers. Sometimes it is. In my opinion, it isn’t being set there in this instance. That is when you want to be on the side of the books. So in this case, take Texas with the smarter people.
Nothing Sacred said:
January 6th, 2010 at 9:41 am
“Regarding faith: the Fellowship of Christian Athletes just awarded Colt the Bobby Bowden Award.”
Is that the award given to the student-athlete that hasn’t banged Bowden’s granddaughter?
Camus said:
January 6th, 2010 at 9:51 am
Historically, teams that have looked great in their conference championship games have done well in the MNC game
eh, let’s investigate for entertainment purposes.
2000 OK d. FSU – OK nipped a good KSU team, so this one’s kind of a wash
2001 the U d Neb – No CCG for either team due to Simms meltdown
2002 OSU d the U – no CCG
2003 LSU d OK – theory holds here. Of course, IMO USC was the best this year.
2004 USC d OU – no CCG for USC does’t matter, theory does not hold
2005 UT d USC – theory holds, though could have gone the other way absent a bionic beast wearing #10.
2006 UF d OSU – ostensibly theory holds BUT OSU played UM in their last game of the season in what was effectively a CCG and a play-in game for the BCS title game for the last season, I don’t think the theory holds here.
2007 LSU d OSU – eh, LSU had to come from behind in the 4th to beat a 2-loss Tennessee team 21-14, so this is a wash.
2008 UF d OK – both teams looked good in CCG, so it’s a wash.
So, not a whole ton of history behind that one it looks like.
nordberg said:
January 6th, 2010 at 9:54 am
In other news, the Fellowship of Christian Athletes also just awarded Brandon Collins the Erik Hardeman Award. We’re going to need a bigger trophy case!!
Magnificent Bastard said:
January 6th, 2010 at 9:55 am
Icebergs are pretty tangible, but perhaps phlogiston brought down the Hindenburg. Or hydrogen. I’m going with phlogiston, and Bama’s coming down like the Hindenburg. Thank you texoz.
n-ea said:
January 6th, 2010 at 9:58 am
“If you’re the quantitative type, I’m putting our odds at 36.5%. If you’re the qualitative type, I’ll say “sorta shitty.”
If you’re neither, I want to know something: just what are you?”
Clipper Cooper has taught me to Synergize qualitative and quantitative with the cunning use of a calculator held upside down.
4517734
Sasha is a Longhorn Dog said:
January 6th, 2010 at 10:00 am
My biggest worry stems from seeing what Greg Davis and the o-line have said to the media. I haven’t really seen any responsibility taken by anyone for the Nebraska fiasco. Everything basically amounts to, “Yeah, we played like crap, but hey! We still won the game!” Seriously? NINE sacks and all you can say is that you didn’t play your best game and there is room for improvement? How about manning up and just admitting that things need to change? But no! We’re Texas and we’re going to do what we do. Fine. Go do what you do and lose the NC game.
Ugh. Rant done.
ChicagoTTU said:
January 6th, 2010 at 10:03 am
SAVE CLIPPER!!!
n-ea said:
January 6th, 2010 at 10:08 am
WhooTex, you’re not the only one. I had to dictionary dot com it.
The Hairline of Wade Boggs said:
January 6th, 2010 at 10:08 am
That FCA award must be bogus if Tebow never won it.
CloseToJumping said:
January 6th, 2010 at 10:09 am
I find your lack of faith disturbing, Scipio.
Pull yourself together.
nordberg said:
January 6th, 2010 at 10:11 am
To quote BatesHorn on any Saturday night, c’mon CTJ, whip it out.
Huckleberry said:
January 6th, 2010 at 10:12 am
2005 could use 2006’s logic here. USC destroyed UCLA something like 66-19 the same day we torched Colorado. Sure, it wasn’t a play-in game, but they played a rivalry game as recently as we played a championship game and they played well.
Bartoncreek said:
January 6th, 2010 at 10:15 am
Well, by definition a Christian is a follower of Jesus. Hence, a folower of Tebow. Tebow can’t be a follower of himself, thus, he is ineligible for the award.
CloseToJumping said:
January 6th, 2010 at 10:15 am
I have something coming. Work is eating me alive. Give me the lunch hour.
Capt. Obvious said:
January 6th, 2010 at 10:27 am
Bama goes up by two TD’s in the first half, Texas responds and scores a FG before the end of the half, and goes on to win the game.
Count it!
Nothing about Muschamp’s defense is intangible, and we all know Colt and Co. have underperformed in big games this year for a variety of reasons, but we also know they’re capable of much more. Our special teams can be explosive, if not downright unbelievable.
I’d like to believe that our A-Level talent runs deeper and is more experienced than Bama’s, and like the OU game last year, unless we’re down by more than 14, we’re still in the game.
This is one of the winningest teams in college football history, that is 3-0 in their bowl games. They’ve got better than a 36.5% chance to win this game.
Let next year be Bama’s year. This year can be ours.
Magnificent Bastard said:
January 6th, 2010 at 10:41 am
Next year can be ours too. Screw Bama.
Harsh said:
January 6th, 2010 at 10:58 am
If we open with a WR screen there’s greater than a 36.5% chance I phlog Greg Davis.
Scip – lighten up, Francis.
Levander Williams said:
January 6th, 2010 at 11:04 am
“In other news, the Fellowship of Christian Athletes also just awarded Brandon Collins the Erik Hardeman Award”
Pflugerville …just like Compton.
Brenham…just like Compton.
Trips Right said:
January 6th, 2010 at 11:12 am
My landscaper brought me pieces of mescal from an agave cactus in Chiapas. I’m going to chew on some of them and then reread your post to see if I feel more upbeat. If not, we’re going to get killed by Bama.
EastSideHorn said:
January 6th, 2010 at 11:13 am
“Let me suggest that petty motivations will lose their value around the same time we hit James Kirkendoll for -2 on our opening play.”
This is just bullshit. No way Kirkendoll catches that pass.
dick said:
January 6th, 2010 at 11:15 am
“This is just bullshit. No way Kirkendoll catches that pass.”
Sadly, it would be a better outcome if he doesn’t. I was actually cheering after the first play of Nebraska game because he dropped it and it saved us 2 yards.
Oink's conscience said:
January 6th, 2010 at 11:39 am
Our only hope is that Will and Major grab GD by his orange polyester collar and inject some sanity to our O-scheme and play calling.
torre said:
January 6th, 2010 at 11:46 am
Always enjoy your blog, Scip. Can you address why you previously stated Ala was a better matchup than Fla? The Big 12CCG meltdown means it makes no difference?
My unheralded heroes for this game: Cody Johnson and Keenan Robinson
tree said:
January 6th, 2010 at 11:49 am
If Texas wins it will be close 20-19 type game
If Bama wins, they will beat UT by plenty 17+ (34-13)
yojimbox said:
January 6th, 2010 at 11:55 am
Underdogs? Bitch, this is the year of the underdog. Just ask TCU, Oregon, and Georgia Tech. We got this.
johnnymac said:
January 6th, 2010 at 12:02 pm
“Yeah, we played like crap, but hey! We still won the game!”
and its close cousin, “Boy that Suh guy sure is good, huh? Glad we out of that one! Whew!”
johnnymac said:
January 6th, 2010 at 12:04 pm
Always enjoy your blog, Scip. Can you address why you previously stated Ala was a better matchup than Fla? The Big 12CCG meltdown means it makes no difference?
Just because it’s a pessimistic outlook doesn’t mean that its not better than the Florida one would be.
Trips Right said:
January 6th, 2010 at 12:14 pm
I just chewed on some mescal and all I can see are the words “Recency Bias Recency Bias Recency BIas”.
Joe Willie said:
January 6th, 2010 at 12:20 pm
“Seriously? NINE sacks and all you can say is that you didn’t play your best game and there is room for improvement?”
Sasha, I wanna kiss you. I couldn’t care less about our o-line struggllliiiiiing. What we know, is we can improve. We’re lookin’ to next season…We’re lookin’ to make noise now…I wanna kiss you! Yeeeaahhh!!!!!
dick said:
January 6th, 2010 at 12:35 pm
hey namath, it’s “straaahh-gaah-ling”
man, between this scipio post and Chris Hall’s fat smiling face, my confidence is shot. not even the mudhole post can save me now.
If you want to feel better, take the under. That way you can subconsciously enjoy Greg Davis’ play calling tomorrow.
Bill said:
January 6th, 2010 at 12:38 pm
Talk about your dark comedy. Scipio, you make Twin Peaks look like a F’ing Disney flick. Can’t argue with your logic, but shit man…keep it to yourself. Don’t you know we’ve stopped really trying to understand this team? Wyoming killed that for me.
It is ALLLL about the intangibles, dude. How else could you explain 13-0? With the exception of Mizzou, there wasn’t really a game in the bunch that was about predictable execution. These guys gave us coronaries for sport. Thank God they didn’t play Lake Travis High…LT would have thumped ‘em and Davis would have stroked out. (Hmmm…….nah.)
Don’t kill our pixie-dust buzz with this truth bullshit. Fat, dumb and happy is, in fact, a lovely way to hang out on this pebble.
Hook’em Horns…Bama is an over-rated bunch of inbreeds.
Bighornfan32 said:
January 6th, 2010 at 12:59 pm
I love how Kafka mentions a dozen things that could work but will never in a thousand years happen under Davis and Mack.
I too thing scipio is understating emotions and the mental aspect of things.
HenryJames said:
January 6th, 2010 at 1:32 pm
If Scipio were to give you some money from out of his wallet, would that help ease the pain?
hopefulhorn said:
January 6th, 2010 at 1:33 pm
Sadly, I have to agree with Scip. Bama will block our defensive front enough better than we will block theirs to win a hard-fought game. We will need a killer defensive effort, some well-timed mistakes from McElroy and a non-offensive TD. These things could certainly happen but I don’t like counting on them.
I will be delighted to be proven wrong.
BEHorn said:
January 6th, 2010 at 1:43 pm
Deutschland, Deutschland, uber alles!
Art Vandelay said:
January 6th, 2010 at 2:28 pm
The evildoers have been stricken down by the curse this year. Graham Harrell doesn’t sniff the NFL, Trabtree gets a late start in the League due to ignorance and hubris, and Leach gets canned. Stoops gets hit with the injury bug, and Bradford gets shoulderized. Now it’s Carl Pelini’s turn for screaming about unworthytrophyness. Saban is up next.
Colt makes some huge plays late as Texas comes from behind.
Tangible this:
Texas 20
Bama 16
ghostofagroundgame said:
January 6th, 2010 at 2:38 pm
Mike Piazza loves the term “comes from behind!”*
*Ever since 1986 I’ve hated the Mets like nothing else.
Jeff Spicoli said:
January 6th, 2010 at 3:17 pm
Ahahaha RIght on, Dude!! Those (alabama) guys are f*gs!!!
bizzle said:
January 6th, 2010 at 3:24 pm
More importantly – WHERE IS CLIPPER DURING THIS TECH COACHING CHANGE?!?! THIS IS HIS FINEST HOUR!!!!!!!!!!!
Levander Williams said:
January 6th, 2010 at 3:45 pm
“The evildoers have been stricken down by the curse this year. Graham Harrell doesn’t sniff the NFL, Trabtree gets a late start in the League due to ignorance and hubris, and Leach gets canned. Stoops gets hit with the injury bug, and Bradford gets shoulderized. Now it’s Carl Pelini’s turn for screaming about unworthytrophyness. Saban is up next.”
Is it safe to call this an intangible that matters? It seems to be the one overriding theme for the 2009 Longhorns. I’ve been amazed at how consistently this has worked all year.
Out of curiosity, did Saban have a coaches vote in 2008? If so, what was his vote?
Better Off Red — Blog — 1/7/10 - the day the Texas whining ends? said:
January 6th, 2010 at 4:00 pm
[...] First, I’ll say up front that I’ll be on the couch drinking some Shiner Bock (yes, you can get it in Seattle) tomorrow night cheering on the Longhorns. A Texas win makes Nebraska’s performance in the B12 Championship game look that much better. Additionally, the only thing worse than the UT bitches are the SEC bitches. So, go Longhorns but I concur with ScipioTex’s synopsis on the potential of a UT win. [...]
The Republic said:
January 6th, 2010 at 4:00 pm
I’d like to believe that the sum of a football team amounts to more than just the quality of their last game.
What would everyone be saying if the Auburn game was Alabama’s last instead of Florida? Finally taking the lead 26-21 in the final minute is nothing to brag or write home about. The same goes double for us. Imagine if we were coming off the Aggie game as our last. Hell, Colt might as well be Jesus walking on water, and all of us believers, not a doubter in the bunch. The Heisman would have already had his name on it when he landed in NY. Muschamp would be the one left scratching his head while Greg Davis would be the one coming out smelling like a rose. And if this was the way the season had ended, you better believe folks would have a whole new perspective on things.
The worth of our Texas Longhorns is more than just their worst game of the season. So to those who would ask, “What have you done for me lately?” I’m not worried, this aint yesterday, it’s today. So what are you gonna do for me now?
Keep the Faith
triplehorn said:
January 6th, 2010 at 5:54 pm
Re OldTimeHorn:
Reminds me of my first post-pubertal experience on the west coast – frosh spring break spent with high school friend at campus of cal santa cruz. I could barely talk or know what to say. I regained consciousness at one point due to lack of air following a stroh’s team 40 pack competition because a cali girl somehow ended up sitting on my face. The first reason I couldn’t talk was differnt.
After being there a few times, you know how to move.
Doperbo said:
January 6th, 2010 at 8:18 pm
My head agrees with you Scipio. That was hard to type.
That being said I propose we agree to cast aside logic like the tarnished whore that she is. Constantly thwarting our dreams with her cold precision as legions of Huckleberries spread her word and defile our temples of Clutch. We are all interconnected, Scipio. Let us kneel together before the alter of The Intangible. It’s shaped like Gary Hogeboom, a parking meter, and a pterodactyl.
Our cause is righteous. We will manufacture a running game. Boom Motherfucker! will be heard in the halls of
Asgard. We will see the enemy driven before us, and hear the lamentations of the women.
Also if we win you have to come to mass with me and do all of the stand-up/sit-down stuff as penance.
Jesus said:
January 6th, 2010 at 8:44 pm
I laugh at your besmirchment of my beloved.
Behold, from Mandel:
“At Sunday’s media session, I spent some time at Texas center Chris Hall’s riser. Hall seems like an incredibly nice guy. He had a big smile on his face the entire time he was up there. I wish the guy no harm. But when asked what reason people should have to believe that his O-line will fare better against the Tide’s defense than it did against Nebraska, Hall’s reply was simply: “If we don’t, we’ll be in trouble.” Then he burst out laughing. It didn’t exactly fill me with confidence.”
nordberg said:
January 6th, 2010 at 8:56 pm
I choose to read that as “then he burst out laughing, like the Joker after showing off his pencil trick”. Then I pretend it’s Studdard, and not Hall. Then I pretend that Sendlein is next to him. Then I take a break, and pretend that Alba gets up and Winona Ryder takes over for her.
Trips Right said:
January 6th, 2010 at 10:33 pm
Jeezus nordberg, Alba to Ryder? WTF? Your fantasies have fluffers?
SpiralOut said:
January 7th, 2010 at 12:34 am
DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMED!!!
Why is our team even bothering to show up? They should just forfeit now and save us all the embarrassment.
nordberg said:
January 7th, 2010 at 7:26 am
I’ve got a thing for her Trips. Leave me alone.
ghostofagroundgame said:
January 7th, 2010 at 7:32 am
@nordberg,
You and every other middling indie rock dude that’s gotten marginally famous since Dave Pirner.
Minnesotahorn said:
January 7th, 2010 at 7:37 am
Your libel towards the Chupacabra will not be tolerated.
“We need Colt to be involved, obviously. Whether it’s zone read, running QB lead draws, encouraging run-pass option boots, or, imagine, just running real goddamn running plays without asking everyone to reach block. We have to do enough to force some sort of honesty.”
I actually think there’s a decent chance Colt can have some success on the ground against the Tide’s primarily man coverage. Obviously he’s not going to gouge them but like you say, we just need enough to keep them honest. If he manages that then game on.
Still Worried said:
January 7th, 2010 at 9:56 am
That McElroy fella is James Street re-incarnated. He’s never lost a game in HS or College.
Nah, that’s in intangible. No way it matters.
I hope.
ValhallaRising said:
January 7th, 2010 at 11:04 am
“Listen, Vince Young was going to lay waste to USC whether he’d won the Heisman in a landslide, was runner-up in Ms. Teen Black America, or won the Publisher’s Clearinghouse Sweepstakes. VY humiliates foes on big stages. He is VY. That is his programming.”
Did the code that programmed VY somehow become corrupt once he went to the NFL? His ability to humiliate foes has seemingly been reverse engineered so that he lays waste to his own well being? If USC had shadowed VY with a SS or LB, and not been so damn arrogant and play straight up, the result would not have been the same. Ok, I am now ready to take heat for that one. Bring it.
NickSaban said:
January 7th, 2010 at 11:31 am
Hey Texas fans (both of you)!
We came here to castrate the Longhorns & take that trophy back to Bama! You can’t stop the running game anymore than you can prevent 2 to 5 of your players leaving the field in an ambulance. Intangibles? I’m your f*ckin’ intangible. I’m so deep in my players’ heads that they all turn around when someone says, “Hey Nick!” They’re pumped and ready physically AND mentally. They are champions. They are warriors. They will not be dissuaded from their mission: to totally dominate Texas on each play and emerge with the victory. We are the TIDE-ans!
No Hard Feelings,
Coach Nick
houstonearler said:
January 7th, 2010 at 12:06 pm
“Did the code that programmed VY somehow become corrupt once he went to the NFL? His ability to humiliate foes has seemingly been reverse engineered so that he lays waste to his own well being? If USC had shadowed VY with a SS or LB, and not been so damn arrogant and play straight up, the result would not have been the same. Ok, I am now ready to take heat for that one. Bring it.”
No one in college football had anyone who could shadow Vince. Too big and fast. Brian Cushing, the NFLs DROY, was spying on VY and got owned repeatedly. Just like he did on about 5 third down conversions on MNF a few weeks ago.
VY was leading the nation in pass efficiency to boot. Also, we had big play weapons named Taylor and Charles. Scheme had nothing to do with it. VY could have ran for 200 a game just about any time he needed to. He did not run much that year except for USC or games we got behind in because he had improved so much as a passer and we were trying to keep him healthy. When he needed to, he just destroyed people as a runner.
He has a great record as a starter in the NFL. Part of the reason is having a freak like him touching the ball on every snap helps out his running backs a lot. It does not show up on VY’s stat sheet, but check out Travis Henry’s numbers playing with Collins and with VY. Ask Chris Johnson if he likes Vince taking the snaps. Check out Ced Benson’s numbers with Simms and Mock in the backfield compared to VY. Check out Jamaal Charles 2.1 YPC decline from 2005 with VY to 2006 with Colt and the exact same offensive line and receivers.
Now, he mainly just runs on third downs to extend drives now, which breaks defenses backs. The back 7 in the NFL is too big and fast for him to run all the time and stay healthy. His passing is improving, even though Tennessee still has bottom 25% WRs. A little more improvement from VY and his WRs, and Tennessee’s offense will be unstoppable. Tennessee was 0-6 to start the season. They go 8-2 with VY. That ain’t a coincidence.
Pederast Hanrahan said:
January 7th, 2010 at 12:12 pm
hope…rationalization…optimism…confidence…uncertainty…doubt…despair…hope…rationalization…optimsim…confidence…uncertaintly…doubt…despair…hope…rationaliaztion………..
One way or another, the viscous cycle ends tonight. The, perhaps, I’ll be able to focus on other things in life that supposedly matter more…work, health, my wife and kids (what are their names again?!?)
Was ist die Definition der Massenverwirrung?
Vatertag in TAMU.
ValhallaRising said:
January 7th, 2010 at 12:57 pm
“Bottom line: fear West Africans. And East Africans, if we’re talking Idi Amin.”
Scipio, you forgot to include any specific reference of notable Maasai, the poster-children of East Africa. You really should postulate on the chances for success of a Maasai child growing up in Houston to play
ValhallaRising said:
January 7th, 2010 at 1:10 pm
houstonearler, I can appreciate your passion and enthusiasm for VY. The best evidence of VY finally grasping the NFL is this years run to 8-2. Frankly, no one could or should defend his actions prior to this spurt. It’s clear he has matured, found inner peace, taken his psychotropics, or just stopped being petulant. I have always liked him as a player and personality. In regards to the USC meltdown versus Texas, USC had shown itself to be narcissistic and arrogant, and if you read their pre-game quotes leading up to that infamous game, you would’ve thought they were going to play UC Davis, not Texas. Further, their SCHEMES, lead their players to be out of position. Darnell Bing should’ve shadowed VY, not Cushing. Scipio wrote it in this article – Saban spent 10 days prior to the SEC title game drawing up fresh and unique schemes to beat Florida. Its not all about the players -or – VY.
Bob Dimick said:
January 9th, 2010 at 11:18 am
Very perceptive foresight in this blog.
Mack Brown is a great coach. Gilbert is a promising quarterback.
Texas will be in the National Championship hunt for the next 3 years.
But for this year – Roll Tide!