Football Articles
Battle For The Basement Bet: A&M/Baylor
Posted by Scipio Tex on November 22nd, 2009 under Football
The punters
Peter Bean from BON and Scipio Tex from Barking Carnival.
The bet
Baylor vs. A&M, straight up. Made during a podcast some time around mid-October.
The stakes
Mockery and a bottle of fine whisky.
But it’s Baylor and A&M, you idiots. Why?
We were trying to rank the worst teams in the league; probably in an attempt to create personal interest in a Big 12 race that was over in October. He contended that Baylor was better than A&M, possibly because Joe Lee Kines cannot control his own bladder (nor those of his players). I felt Peter was overlooking FIGHTING AGGIE SPIRIT!
WHOOP!
The buildup
Amusing and surprisingly riveting.
The ups and downs for each team in preparation for the Battle of the Brazos were agonizing as each team tested new lows and quickly eroded the foundation of any ephemeral high. Recall that A&M had just been beaten by KSU 62-14 in one of the more gutless efforts in Big 12 history while Baylor lost valiantly to Iowa State 24-10. Peter had every right to believe he’d just suckered me after that powerful Bear performance in Ames. However, I was banking on the fact that A&M was more gutless than talentless.
Here’s how it unfolded:
10/24
A&M goes into Lubbock and reams Texas Tech while Baylor loses to Oklahoma State convincingly. I feel like a cross between a wizard and scientist. I begin a barrage of text messages with various nonsensical Aggie exclamations and expressions I’ve learned on Texags and since I’m on PST, they are calculated to wake him up well past his bedtime (8:30 pm, after Matlock reruns). Peter is now alarmed. The Aggies are awesome and will probably win out and he fucking knows it.
10/31
A&M whips Iowa State 35-10 in College Station. A&M could probably hang with 1995 Nebraska. Why isn’t Tony Jerod-Eddie getting more Outland Trophy talk? This ISU squad is the same team that beat Baylor last week. Yet Baylor loses to Nebraska 20-10 in a surprisingly competitive game. I don’t like that latter score one bit, but I’m still feeling good. I now begin taunting him during phone conversations. He puts on a brave face, but I sense fear. Jerrod Johnson should be in the Heisman race.
11/7/09
A&M loses to Colorado 35-34. The 4th quarter is played out in slow motion like a scene from Crash. It’s a choke job like nothing I’ve seen. This can’t be happening. Oh, well. This bet was never about A&M being good. They just need to be better than Baylor.
Except that Baylor wins in Columbia 40-32 and Nick Florence has a career passing day. Holy shit. Peter begins a steady barrage of taunts. He is giddy. I am shaken at my very core. I respond with various Aggie spirit cries, but they feel hollow. Baylor is going to beat A&M by 20.
11/14
Texas is up on Baylor 40-0 at halftime. Baylor is a joke. We can even run on them. There’s no way that team beats A&M in College Station. My confidence is restored and Peter is in for a world of…what? What’s that?
OU- 65, A&M – 10.
And the Aggies quit again. Damn it.
Neither one of us taunts the other as we are both now absolutely convinced the other person has suckered us. We have no confidence in our teams, a feeling of total betrayal, rampant insecurity, and we are brimming with angst. We are awash in hysterical hope and unrealistic expectation battered down by humiliation, confusion, paranoia, and resentment.
In short, by taking this bet, we have assumed the identity of Aggie Fan and Bear Fan. So this is what it’s like. shiver
11/21
My taunts to Peter began Friday evening and continue until Saturday morning. We exchange calls, but neither of us will answer. It is a psychological cat and mouse game.
The Aggies respond well to humiliation, I reason – look at their KSU bounce back win over Tech. The Aggies recover from 2-3 gridiron Katrinas a season. It’s a core competency. Peter was feeling cocky as well, presumably because Notre Dame is having a miserable season and that always makes him chipper. This further reinforced the idea that God was not Catholic and though he is certainly not Baptist (God is literate and hates White Rain hair spray, for starters) he may show some Protestant love on Saturday.
It’s not to be…
A&M – 38
Baylor – 3
WHOOOP!!
You should know that this game was so pathetic that it wasn’t carried on any TV network (not even Oxygen) and the Aggies were giving away half price tickets so they could break 65,000 in attendance. So I had to “watch” this pillow fight on ESPN Gametracker. Gametracker had so much interest in the game that they had Phil Taylor – Baylor’s obese and overrated defensive tackle transfer from Penn State – as the Baylor starting QB (it was Szymanski, they share #11). So the first quarter stat line was something like Phil Taylor 2 of 4 for 13 yards which is about what the actual Phil Taylor would have done. Then Baylor put Joe Pawelek in at QB and they were off to the races.
A&M ran the ball at will and it was obvious that they were going to win by the late 2nd quarter. We then had the following text exchange (actual transcript):
Scipio: (Braveheart exection scene) Peter, we can end this all now if you will only confess. Do you confess?
Peter: Never. I pray only that if I die I die well. BAYLORRRRRRRRRRRRRR
Scipio: I will send each of your limbs to the corners of Texas as a warning. Your head will sit on a pike @ The Dixie Chicken.
Peter: I would rather confess a gay affair with my brother Baptist than quit.
I admired his spirit and his ability to understand obscure movie references. I left to go ride my mountain bike, with confidence.
However, at games conclusion, there was only thing I could text. When superiority is asserted over another, in all cultures across the world, there is one universally understood coup de grace.
Scipio: Ha ha ha ha! Ha ha ha ha!
Peter: Fuck me.
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Ag_in_TX wrote a new blog post: Did Rick Barnes use a plant last night to distract KU players? ago
If you watched the game, and if you have one drop of testosterone in your bloodstream, you couldn’t have missed her. The redhead with huge tracts of land – right behind the KU bench – who stood for every time out and stared at the KU players.
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Darius Pourceau commented on the blog post Recruiting the Trenches ago
Welcome to the site guys! Aaron Rodgers is the man.
http://bornhogwild.fantake.com/
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Bob in Houston commented on the blog post Texas Hoops vs. Kansas: Post-Mortem 16 minutes ago
Should be “complementary” scorers. Oh well.
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Bob in Houston commented on the blog post Texas Hoops vs. Kansas: Post-Mortem 19 minutes ago
OK, I was there. Not the best seat in the house, but not a bad one either.
Trips hit part of what struck me over and over. KU had offensive options/outlets when Texas forced them into trouble (which happened quite a bit, as the stats showed that Texas did bring defense last night), and the
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Mister Mike wrote a new blog post: ”Bo Made Me Cry.” 58 minutes ago
At least, that’s the line I would expect to hear from Rivals or Scouts if they were in a relationship with Bo Pelini and ended up going to Dr. Phil to try and work out their differences. Of course, that would never happen because Bo would’ve just laughed, packed her shit up, and thrown
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HenryJames commented on the blog post Scholarship Numbers & Junior Days 1 hour, 11 minutes ago
CTJ,
Rivals doesn’t think there are any elite players in Texas this year. Do you think we’ll have to go out of state to compensate?
Thanks!
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D W commented on the blog post Another night, another would-be hero 2 hours, 3 minutes ago
Hamilton is so stupid on the court it makes my teeth hurt.
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Sailor Ripley commented on the blog post Top 8 Teams in College Hoops 4 hours, 54 minutes ago
Yeah, I think we can scratch Texas out of there. Who takes place 8?
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Sailor Ripley commented on the blog post Looking at Texas 5 hours, 7 minutes ago
You guys have a basketball team. Is it Indianapolis this year?
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Scipio Tex wrote a new blog post: 2011 Texas Football Recruiting 5 hours, 14 minutes ago
Junior Days are right around the corner, so I thought we’d break down needs, talk recruits, and find a ray of gridiron sunshine in the long and cursed offseason.
CTJ gives us his thoughts too. Had I realized, I might have saved myself the typing.
Unlike last year where DFW held an
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admin commented on the blog post Making a Case for a 1 Seed: Villanova Tops the ’Neers 5 hours, 27 minutes ago
Enjoyed watching these guys tonight. I was blown away to see Huggy was 5X coach of the year. He seems like a tourney flame out more often than not. That Kenyon Marting leg break didn’t do him any favors.
How do you see them progresing in the tourney?
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admin commented on the blog post Making a Case for a 1 Seed: Villanova Tops the ’Neers 5 hours, 27 minutes ago
Enjoyed watching these guys tonight. I was blown away to see Huggy was 5X coach of the year. He seems like a tourney flame out more often than not. That Kenyon Martin leg break didn’t do him any favors.
How do you see them progresing in the tourney?
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admin commented on the blog post Duke Basketball: The Devil You Know? 5 hours, 29 minutes ago
Avery Bradley, who shot 77% from the foul line in high school and is now shooting 47% at Texas would probably be shooting closer to his high school average if he played at Duke.
Sweet Jesus that’s ridonkulous.
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admin commented on the blog post Duke Basketball: The Devil You Know? 5 hours, 29 minutes ago
Avery Bradley, who shot 77% from the foul line in high school and is now shooting 47% at Texas would probably be shooting closer to his high school average if he played at Duke.
Sweet Jesus that’s ridonkulous.
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Importance of Recruiting Rankings by Position.
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For the purposes
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HenryJames will soon be here to captivate you with his wit and extensive knowledge of the most storied franchise in professional sports history, the New York Yankees.
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admin commented on the blog post Nebraska Fits the Profile of the 2010 National Champion 6 hours, 22 minutes ago
Interesting but call me skeptical now. We’ve got experience at QB but not positive experience.
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admin commented on the blog post Nebraska Fits the Profile of the 2010 National Champion 6 hours, 22 minutes ago
Interesting but call me skeptical now. We’ve got experience at QB but not positive experience.
Good line. What is the thinking on his ability vs. the injury?
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bigdukesix commented on the blog post Scholarship Numbers & Junior Days 6 hours, 34 minutes ago
I really don’t want to repeat the horrid situation of the past few years where we starved for depth and talent at DT. It’s critical not to let defensive line recruiting slip. That said, if we bring in two tackles and two ends this year that would be 21 scholarships used on the
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Arthur Goddamn Fenstemaker commented on the blog post Weekly Stats Update 6 hours, 36 minutes ago
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bigdukesix commented on the blog post Scholarship Numbers & Junior Days 6 hours, 42 minutes ago
It appears as though the dude is committed to raiding the SEC and ignoring the West Coast.
It’s understandable, with the way that recruiting is generally territory based. Isaiah Crowell, the RB we’ve been linked to, goes to Columbus Carver. That’s an Auburn pipeline school. Still, I can’t imagine that recruitment lasting much
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bigdukesix commented on the blog post Scholarship Numbers & Junior Days 6 hours, 53 minutes ago
Actually it’s Hegarty. My mistake.
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Trips Right commented on the blog post Mid-Season Thoughts and OU Pre-Game 7 hours, 2 minutes ago
Thoughts? I think that’s a damn good write up.
Other than that, root for Willie Warren to be healthy because he screws up Oklahoma’s chemistry. Everything else can be found in your report. Maintain contact with Cade Davis on defense and don’t let TMG go buck wild.
Your motion game should confound
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bigdukesix commented on the blog post Scholarship Numbers & Junior Days 7 hours, 5 minutes ago
The OL from New Mexico is Matt Hagerty, with a “g”. He’s on pretty much every national top 100 list that I’ve seen so far.
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Trips Right wrote a new blog post: Texas Hoops vs. Kansas: Post-Mortem 7 hours, 8 minutes ago
I have a man crush on Al McGuire, the basketball coach that lead Marquette to its only national championship.
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Nickel Rover wrote a new blog post: Another night, another would-be hero 7 hours, 31 minutes ago
Basketball:
Against Oklahoma St., we saw Hamilton rise up. Against Oklahoma Bradley made a heroic effort, against Kansas James contributed his usual 20-10 and J’Covan Brown came out of the woodwork. Again I ask, who is the go-to scorer?
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Kevin Berger wrote a new blog post: Making a Case for a 1 Seed: Villanova Tops the ’Neers 7 hours, 31 minutes ago
Going into the game you would have thought the battle would have been a classic matchup between West Virginia’s frontcourt and Villanova’s backcourt.
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Nickel Rover commented on the blog post Scholarship Numbers & Junior Days 7 hours, 58 minutes ago
The staff is actually recruiting pretty well for a man-blocking scheme with guys like Espinosa, Ashcraft, Huey, and so on… of course Texas doesn’t run such a scheme.
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dick commented on the blog post Scholarship Numbers & Junior Days 8 hours, 15 minutes ago
‘”It appears to be McFarland out of El Paso. I would like to see Texas get him. :”
El Paso alert, El Paso alert! Andre Jones and Trips are from El Paso. Think about that for a minute.
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dick commented on the blog post Scholarship Numbers & Junior Days 8 hours, 25 minutes ago
Dam, I was just going to post the same shit.
OT and DB are the most important postions. OT we need Westerman, Haverty and Drango/Greenlea/Cochran. What do we know about Cochran?
parlin said:
November 22nd, 2009 at 6:03 am
“God is literate and hates White Rain hair spray, for starters”
Awesomeness. I expect to re-read it in my Statesman tomorrow morning.
t1climb1 said:
November 22nd, 2009 at 7:40 am
Man I miss riding my mountain and road bike in the bay area. I spent 2004-2008 living in Mill Valley in Marin county. One of the most beautiful spots in the country and the riding is unbelievable. I am happy to be back in TX but cycling in Dallas blows.
What was your post about again Scip?
Redfoot said:
November 22nd, 2009 at 11:21 am
Had me in stitches.
RomaVicta said:
November 22nd, 2009 at 11:39 am
“My taunts to Peter began Friday evening and continue until Saturday morning. We exchange calls, but neither of us will answer. It is a psychological cat and mouse game.”
Still laughing. Well done!
pleaseplaykindle said:
November 22nd, 2009 at 3:07 pm
What kind of whisky? (I noticed you spelled it without the e so it had better be a good single malt).
hornbymarriage said:
November 22nd, 2009 at 8:18 pm
“In short, by taking this bet, we have assumed the identity of Aggie Fan and Bear Fan. So this is what it’s like. shiver.”
I wept.
V said:
November 22nd, 2009 at 11:18 pm
Holy shit that’s funny. And informative: thanks for the insight on the collective psychology!
The Bobs said:
November 23rd, 2009 at 11:17 am
“… it wasn’t carried on any TV network (not even Oxygen)…”
now THIS is what it feels like to be an Aggie or Bear fan! Still – shiver seems the correct response. Great stuff, and congratulations on the huge victory, Scipio! I know you’ve always wanted to somehow share in an actual aTm win without feeling too dirty.