Connect with your Facebook Account

Contact

4

Shaq vs.

Posted by Hank Dudek on August 26th, 2009 under Basketball

I watched Shaq last night on his new show and thought about my brief career with beach volleyball. Leave it to beach volleyball players to truly humble the big man.

If you have ever played beach volleyball against anyone of any prowess you will find a certain arrogance and snobbery that can not be denied. The bottom line is that a lot of the really good players are douche bags.

That being said basketball players and Shaq in particular possesses his own cockiness. The thing about hoopsters is they are used to playing with a few more guys on their team and dealing with the fact that not everyone is a superstar.

It was funny to watch as Todd Rogers, a whiner and prolific 2 man beach player, matched up with Shaq, a hacker in volleyball. Todd seemed a little irritated that Shaq kept popping the ball over on two instead of setting him on the net. He also got a little pissed that a 7′1″ freak could not block a 6′3″ girl two months after having her first baby. 350 pounds and Hermosa Beach sand do not exactly spell V-E-R-T-I-C-A-L. I am sure if it was another hack on the beach Rogers would have told him to move his fat ass and start making some plays but he decided that his life was more important than asserting his dominance in the sand.

I loved hearing Shaq continuously saying “my bad.” There aren’t too many sports where your weaknesses are singled out so quick. Can’t pass, can’t set, can’t block, get your ass whooped by two chicks who dominate their sport even with an Olympic Gold Medalist as your partner.

I give Shaq credit for putting himself out there and for putting that Speedo on at the end of the program. Many women have wondered what the Shaq Daddy was packing-now they know and we know that Shaq made the right choice by playing basketball and not volleyball.

More from this Barker


Share This

  • StumbleUpon

4 Responses

  1. On the douchebag front, I know exactly what you mean. Played in a league in Austin and I came closer to getting into fist fights at Aussie’s than I did running pickup games at Clark Field courts when they weren’t checking ID’s. Good post, I’ll have to check that show out.

  2. I really enjoyed the one with Rothlesberger. Lots of great, good natured trash talk.

  3. You mean the one where the rest of the players were in full pads playing touch football? Yeah, epic…

  4. I cooked at Aussie’s one summer. You’d probably get a fight a week on the volley ball courts off the trash talking alone.

Leave a Reply

Related Articles

No related posts.

Activity

  • Nate Heupel commented on the blog post Oklahoma Sooners – Recruiting So Far   23 minutes ago

    BOC: Neither has visited, yet we hold ’ships open for both.

    SHARETHIS.addEntry({ title: ””, url: ”” });

  • Nate Heupel wrote a new blog post: Because We’re Dedicated To Doing Stupid Things – Tiny Gallon Reportedly Took Payout   32 minutes ago

    TMZ reports that Tiny Gallon took a $3000 payout from an agent. My God, Capel has no control over this team whatsoever. This is 2007 offseason Texas football levels of embarrassing. You can’t let a half dozen bad apples spoil a bushel of 10 apples…that analogy sucked balls, but you get my

    SHARETHIS.addEntry({ title: ””, url: ”” });

  • Sailor Ripley commented on the blog post Previewing Jimmer and the Cougars   1 hour, 43 minutes ago

    Great stuff, bear. really looking forward to this game.

    SHARETHIS.addEntry({ title: ””, url: ”” });

  • Nickel Rover commented on the blog post Barnes worst team   1 hour, 43 minutes ago

    06_UT: you are probably right. I thought about changing the post description to “least favorite Barnes team” because that’s more accurate but I didn’t feel like it.
    That said, I’m not sure this team would beat those other two. They would lose Abrams and let him go 7-15 on 3s and the Abrams team played better

  • admin commented on the blog post Nike U in Turmoil   1 hour, 48 minutes ago

    Aren’t they building some sort of super duper hoops arena? Most expensive ever bilt or something?

    Who will the get? Mark Few?

  • Sailor Ripley commented on the blog post Nike U in Turmoil   1 hour, 48 minutes ago

    Aren’t the building some sort of super duper hoops arena? Most expensive ever bilt or something?

    Who will the get? Mark Few?

  • srr50 wrote a new blog post: Nike U in Turmoil   2 hours, 5 minutes ago

    10 weeks ago, Oregon played in the Rose Bowl as Pac 10 champions. Since their loss to Ohio State, the program has been in some kind of bizzaro parallel universe where every headline concerns a player arrest, a firing, or now a resignation.

    Mike Bellotti, the Duck AD and former head coach earlier this week

  • Luke commented on the blog post First Round: Clemson Tigers   4 hours, 16 minutes ago

    Prescient comment, Doc.

    I think we learned today that no team is really a mirror image of Missouri, even if Clemson is about as close as it gets. Unless you have significantly better/more talented athletes, if you try to run with the Tigers, you will lose. This team is so much fun to watch in games

  • srr50 commented on the blog post March Madness Open Thread Part Deaux   4 hours, 31 minutes ago

    Good to see that Tom Penders still believes in the weave offense. Maryland finally figured out that if you pass quickly, the middle is always open.

    37-29 Maryland late in the first half.

  • Luke wrote a new blog post: Previewing Jimmer and the Cougars   4 hours, 31 minutes ago

    Kansas State is going to be under a lot of pressure tomorrow night in primetime at the Ford Center.

    Not only are the Wildcats the favored #2 seed going against #7 seed BYU, but if the Wildcats lose, they may sentence hundreds of boys to nonstop harassment from all the kids who think that “Jimmer” was

    SHARETHIS.addEntry({ title: ””, url: ”” });

  • Ibas water bottle wrote a new blog post: Georgia Tech post mortem   4 hours, 43 minutes ago

    We came up short.

    Credit to Georgia Tech they worked the ball inside where they had the advantage and played great D on the perimeter. Matt Pilgrim is the most athletic big man we’ve had in years around here and he was irrelevant. When we tried to drive they collapsed like Chris Farley on a

    SHARETHIS.addEntry({ title: ””, url: ”” });

  • Phenomenal Smith commented on the blog post First Round: Clemson Tigers   5 hours, 19 minutes ago

    Doc, the turnovers seemed to do the trick – there were great big chunks of time when Mizzou didn’t even have to get into a half court offense.

    Great to see Ramsey have such a good game and pretty stifle Booker. As Euclid said during the game, even when Mizzou doesn’t play well

  • dick commented on the blog post Barnes worst team   5 hours, 58 minutes ago

    “Also because those other teams gave great effort almost every game. This team’s effort was questionable. Dumb and lazy, not a good combo…..”

    This is what made this season so bizarre for me. This has never been a problem for Barnes’ teams. But I actually questioned this team’s heart and desire to play together

  • srr50 commented on the blog post March Madness Open Thread Part Deaux   6 hours, 12 minutes ago

    Travis Ford spent the 2nd half channeling his inner Rick Barnes — lot’s of standing around on offense while one player tries to generate something off a ball screen — then taking a forced shot.

    So the Big 12 goes 5-2 in Round One.

  • skymonkeyhorn commented on the blog post Barnes worst team   6 hours, 17 minutes ago

    This is the worst coached team ever in Barnes era. Period.
    Worst defense over the whole season,
    Offense sucked big time and the bench coaching was horrible, ransom’s attitude was better then the coach’s overall this season.
    Trips write up pre and post better then the game plan and O schemes.
    Hell we could have

  • srr50 commented on the blog post March Madness Open Thread Part Deaux   6 hours, 20 minutes ago

    advertisers think they will probably get some deals for the additional 32 games that would be added. The feeling is that an ESPN would disount rates somewhat, since they already have a dual revenue stream — advertising dollars and subscription fees.

    It’s all about content for ESPN — even mediocre content.

  • dick commented on the blog post FLV March Madness First Round Bets   6 hours, 22 minutes ago

    a great first round of the tournament from an excitement standpoint, very mediocre from a gambling standpoint.

  • srr50 commented on the blog post March Madness Open Thread Part Deaux   6 hours, 38 minutes ago

    Ga. Tech — last in the ACC in free throw shooting at 64% — 13 for 13 tonight.

  • srr50 commented on the blog post March Madness Open Thread Part Deaux   6 hours, 47 minutes ago

    A poll of media buyers from the major agencies overhwhelmingly showed that advertisers believe that the NCAA will expand, and the tournament will join the BCS on ESPN.

  • whiskey wrote a new blog post: The week in news- Pariahs, Malcontents and Power Hour   6 hours, 50 minutes ago

    In the midst of March Madness, St. Patrick’s Day, house guests, nice weather outside and a host of other distractions I still managed to come across quite a few interesting college football stories this week. Here we go.

    Mike Leach and Craig James were apparently in the same room this week and nobody wrestled.  Bummer.  Leach

    SHARETHIS.addEntry({ title: ””, url: ”” });

  • srr50 commented on the blog post March Madness Open Thread Part Deaux   7 hours, 2 minutes ago

    Anderson finds out what going to the paint is like when there is a big who knows how to defend the low block.

  • srr50 wrote a new blog post: March Madness Open Thread Part Deaux   7 hours, 11 minutes ago

    So far on Day Two, no buzzer beaters, but there was the obligatory #12 over #5 with Cornell thumping Temple 78-65, but the Ivy League school was everyone’s “inside” pick for an upset. Still the day hasn’t come close to generating the action that Thursday had.

    Today
    #5 Texas A&M 69 #12

  • Patrick Bateman commented on the blog post Barnes worst team   7 hours, 37 minutes ago

    I wasn’t trying to say they quit. They just didn’t play hard a lot of the time. Lazy = lack of effort. Example, our transition defense was about 75% effort and 25% stupidity. We loafed down court a lot. The kids didn’t like to lose so they would fight back,

  • Patrick Bateman commented on the blog post Barnes worst team   9 hours, 9 minutes ago

    This the most disappointing team because our talent level is higher than those others.

    The DGib/Buckman team was the least talented, barely, after the injury to LaMarcus and Tucker’s suspension.

    Last year’s team was the hardest to watch. Just watching AJ Abrams, who I don’t hate as much as most, run around like a

  • uthookem commented on the blog post Barnes worst team   9 hours, 16 minutes ago

    Agreed on Damo being my favorite Longhorn basketball player, I wish him all the best.

    This was definitely the worst, by far.

  • Trips Right commented on the blog post Texas Hoops vs. Wake Forest: Post Mortem   10 hours, 29 minutes ago

    Don’t have time to address each and every comment now, but I wanted to say thanks to everyone for contributing to the site this season. It’s made it a lot of fun to follow a team that’s tough to watch at times.

    Also, I wanted to thank you for the kind words as

  • Hiphopopotamus commented on the blog post Big Dance: Day Two   10 hours, 30 minutes ago

    And that’s all she wrote…relatively boring day so far. A&M out to a nice early lead.

    SHARETHIS.addEntry({ title: ””, url: ”” });

  • Art Vandelay commented on the blog post Texas Hoops vs. Wake Forest: Post Mortem   10 hours, 33 minutes ago

    Trips,

    Great work all year long. Love the passion. The fact that you kept writing these (even around the birth of a child), is fantastic, shows your commitment, and is a little freaky. :-)

    I think you showed great restraint in this post. It would have been easier to “go off” on Barnes.

  • ghostofagroundgame commented on the blog post Barnes worst team   10 hours, 34 minutes ago

    Second awesomest thing — Magnus gets his woman to go to Hooters with him.

  • Hiphopopotamus commented on the blog post Big Dance: Day Two   10 hours, 40 minutes ago

    Missouri going to hang on…

    Sconsin clinging to a 2 point cushion

    SHARETHIS.addEntry({ title: ””, url: ”” });