Football Articles
As you’re going about your July 4 today, remembering the brilliant men who founded this nation, honoring all those brave souls who have fallen to ensure what freedoms you have remaining, cooking up slabs of fatty meats on your grill, and consuming large quantities of beer, wine, vodka, tequila or some combination thereof, be sure to take just a moment out of your time to thank your parents, a counselor, a mentor or whomever else it might have been that steered you away from going to school at Texas A&M University.
Think how it must feel to be an Aggie today. Think how you would feel while reading ESPN.com’s ranking of today’s hottest college football rivalries that was published this week. Imagine reading that the real rivalry between the hated t-sips and Oklahoma tops that list. Then imagine that the “rivalry” you’ve been brainwashed into believing was the most important in your life – that of course being with the detested school you so cleverly refer to as “tu” – does not appear anywhere on that list. Imagine then reading that ESPN considers your main rivalry to be the one with Texas Tech – which you again very cleverly call “tick”, ha-hah.
Then think how it would feel to know in your heart of hearts that even that isn’t a ”rivalry” in any real sense of the word, given that “Tick” (hah-hah, you’re really cracking yourself and your buddies up with that one over at the Dixie Chicken, ain’t ya?) has now won 11 of the last 15 games with your glorious Aggies. And try to imagine how you’d feel even worse when you have to admit that the only real “rivalry” you have remaining from the old Southwest Conference is the vaunted Highway 6 annual matchup with the Baylor Bears.
While you’re thinking that one over, try to put yourself in the jackboots of any Aggie and imagine how you’d feel reading yesterday’s report on the financial problems the Texas A&M athletics department is experiencing. ‘How can this be?’ you’d think, ‘aren’t Aggies the most loyal, the most generous fans in the whole wide world?’ You’d think back to the first joke they taught you on the first day of Fish Camp back in the day: What does a tu graduate call an A&M graduate ten years after graduation? Boss! Hah-hah! That’s a great one there, ain’t it?
Yet, you look on as Bill Byrne desperately tries to come up with $4.5 million spending cuts so he can keep making payments on the debt his department has run up. Meanwhile, you just saw a report a couple of months ago that talked about how tu’s athletics department is one of the handful of the best-funded operations in the nation, and that report came a couple of months after Texas Monthly dedicated half of an issue to the subject.
It’s getting harder and harder to blame it all on that danged Burnt Orange Media Conspiracy (LOPEZ: Inside the Fourth Estate — UT Media Bias). And if all them t-sips are callin’ all us Aggies “boss”, how come is it that all them “bosses” ain’t properly funding the danged ol’ football program?
That’s what you’d be thinking right now if you’d gone to college at Texas A&M.
And then you’d have another football season to look forward to. Gig ‘em! Good bull! Saw ‘em off, boys!
Think how you’d feel knowing your team went 4-8 in Mike Sherman’s first year at the helm, and the prospects don’t look any better for 2009. Think what it would be like to take a look at the schedule, trying to figure out how your team might accidentally be able to squeak past Iowa State or Alabama Birmingham at home. And thank God Army’s not on the schedule this year!
And then think how depressing it would be knowing that, even if your team goes 3-9 or 2-10 in the upcoming season, and the fans are screaming for a sacrificial lamb come December, good ol’ Sherm still has six guaranteed years left on his contract, and your athletics department has no means of buying him out.
That, friends, is what it means to be an Aggie today. So as you are celebrating this nation’s independence day today, thanking those who came before you and counting up all of your blessings in life, add the fact that you’re not an Aggie to the list. Unless, of course, you are an Aggie. If that’s the case, well, I got nothing to help you.
Hook ‘em!!!
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Activity
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RRR commented on the blog post Mid-Season Thoughts and OU Pre-Game ago
Thanks Trips. I’m hoping for lots of Willie Warren trying to be Sheron Collins. TMG in sync is the scariest thing to face in Norman. That or we get beat up on the boards which seems to be recurring theme of Texas Tech road games.
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Blake Stansbery commented on the blog post Recruiting the Trenches ago
TP welcome to the network.
I like how you broke this down, and identified which positions history shows a high star ranking has proven to be important. I personally feel that after what all the recruiting sites dub their top players that there is a major falloff. We all love that the recruiting sites bring
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Hiphopopotamus commented on the blog post Did Rick Barnes use a plant last night to distract KU players? ago
I’m convinced.
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Mister Mike commented on the blog post Thoughts on the win in Austin ago
Don’t follow basketball as much as you guys do here, but I did watch that game last night. Using my extensive experience in analyzing the sport (next to none) the game felt like it had that “Big Game” feel to it, but somehow it just didn’t turn out that way. Kind of…lackluster?
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Mister Mike commented on the blog post Carl Pelini Remains Red 3 minutes ago
Personally, I think it’s going to be a long time, if ever, before Carl considers leaving. Him and Bo share some kind of vulcan mind-meld when it comes to the defense. He knows exactly what Bo wants and what he expects and he gets that shit done. I’m glad NU awarded him
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Trips Right commented on the blog post Texas Hoops vs. Kansas: Post-Mortem 4 minutes ago
EP, Gillispie is a helluva coach but he’s a horrible representation for any marquee program.
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skymonkeyhorn commented on the blog post Texas Hoops vs. Kansas: Post-Mortem 5 minutes ago
Yeah but El Paso / West Texas are known for unknown phenomena , like the lights , strange things happen out in the desert.
Gilly may be a UFO flier for all we know.
Look at Trips he is kind of strange with his fantasy on trim and stripper poles, sometimes I think that Trips -
Hiphopopotamus wrote a new blog post: Thoughts on the win in Austin 5 minutes ago
We weren’t overly impressive, and at the same time, it may have been this team’s most impressive win. The game didn’t have much rhythm. We never shot it well. In fact, our two best guys can’t be much worse from the field. But damned if we didn’t guard them – especially in that first half.
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Farmer Ted wrote a new blog post: Carl Pelini Remains Red 7 minutes ago
We all know that Carl Pelini is a popular guy, and now we’ve learned that Tennessee recently courted him to fill their DC vacancy. Carl said no:
“We’re on the verge of something great at Nebraska,” Pelini said. “I love working with Bo. That’s all I’m going to say about it.”
Fortunately for Husker fans, Carl isSHARETHIS.addEntry({ title: ””, url: ”” });
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Trips Right commented on the blog post Texas Hoops vs. Kansas: Post-Mortem 11 minutes ago
Patrick, no this is hilarious (From Chip Brown):
And Barnes finally admitted after Monday night’s 80-68 loss to No. 1 Kansas that he can no longer have guards Justin Mason and Dogus Balbay on the floor together.
“We just can’t, otherwise it’s five on three,” Barnes said.
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Mister Mike commented on the blog post ”Bo Made Me Cry.” 12 minutes ago
The problem Ted is that Bo doesn’t like to give anyone the appearance that he’s not in control of the program. For some reason, he feels that the flow of information to the recruiting sites and services is far too much, and he’s seeking to try and control that. There’s a reason why
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Trips Right commented on the blog post Did Rick Barnes use a plant last night to distract KU players? 20 minutes ago
Wholesome goodness. Thanks for posting.
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HenryJames commented on the blog post Another night, another would-be hero 21 minutes ago
I think Kiper has Okung too high at number five. He’s a right tackle in the NFL, and no one will take a RT that high.
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skymonkeyhorn commented on the blog post Texas Hoops vs. Kansas: Post-Mortem 26 minutes ago
Basketball is a simple game of passing,dribbling,catching,shooting and denying the other team from scoring. Simple yet played by chess masters that know what they have (known quantities) in players,chemistry, and heart (will to win).
Maybe they are also an unknown phenomena to the stubborn, mad,lusting minds of entrenched coaches that are playing the games -
uthookem commented on the blog post 2011 Texas Football Recruiting 40 minutes ago
I consider this thread incomplete until a picture of Barney Frank is added.
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HenryJames commented on the blog post Scholarship Numbers & Junior Days 40 minutes ago
I summer in Brookshire.
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Texastough commented on the blog post Texas Hoops vs. Kansas: Post-Mortem 1 hour ago
“As long as he is putting teams into the tourney every year, I think he is untouchable. ”
Thats basically the equivalent of being one of the top six or seven Big 12 teams, which doesn’t cut it. I think he has to average top 2-3 in Big12 and sweet 16 or so to be
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Bob in Houston commented on the blog post Texas Hoops vs. Kansas: Post-Mortem 1 hour, 6 minutes ago
Bob, essentially what you are saying is that we are not a well coached basketball team. I agree.
Jordan Hamilton is a selfish and lazy player. He is a terrible fit to play for Barnes. Not sure if either one will be around next season at this rate.
I’ve seen too much player development and too much
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skymonkeyhorn commented on the blog post Texas Hoops vs. Kansas: Post-Mortem 1 hour, 7 minutes ago
Oh ! Trips your one liners are getting very very good in a nice sort of way. This was a great one.
Almost a classic. “ponderos, shouldn’t you be supersizing something somewhere?”
Keep up the good work……
“Admirable that you continue to attempt an analysis with some type of hope for them” -
Farmer Ted commented on the blog post ”Bo Made Me Cry.” 1 hour, 8 minutes ago
Good read, Mike. There’s a lot of truth in there. I do believe that one of the reasons that Florida’s recruiting class was rated so highly is that 100% of their signees were offered scholarships by Florida. If Florida loses interest in a kid, his stock drops a bit. That’s defensible
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Ag_in_TX wrote a new blog post: Did Rick Barnes use a plant last night to distract KU players? 1 hour, 18 minutes ago
If you watched the game, and if you have one drop of testosterone in your bloodstream, you couldn’t have missed her. The redhead with huge tracts of land – right behind the KU bench – who stood for every time out and stared at the KU players.
She stuck out like a sore thumb. Never
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Darius Pourceau commented on the blog post Recruiting the Trenches 1 hour, 20 minutes ago
Welcome to the site guys! Aaron Rodgers is the man.
http://bornhogwild.fantake.com/
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Art Vandelay commented on the blog post Texas Hoops vs. Kansas: Post-Mortem 1 hour, 22 minutes ago
Bob, essentially what you are saying is that we are not a well coached basketball team. I agree.
Jordan Hamilton is a selfish and lazy player. He is a terrible fit to play for Barnes. Not sure if either one will be around next season at this rate.
We went scoreless for 10:54 during
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Trips Right commented on the blog post 2011 Texas Football Recruiting 1 hour, 32 minutes ago
Well done. The Barney Frank line blindsided me like a strain of juarez clap. Funny stuff.
I’d like for us to go out of state for a QB and at least 1 maybe two CB’s. Is Quandre tall enough to play corner or angry enough to play safety?
Rumor around the campfire is
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skymonkeyhorn commented on the blog post Texas Hoops vs. Kansas: Post-Mortem 1 hour, 45 minutes ago
I feel our pain…
Was Barnes wearing a helmet last night. I did not notice as I was in awe of the blood being spilled
on the floor for almost 11 minutes without a point.
Coach Knight was reading this blogs out loud for TV.
The most insightful was that Barnes needs to go to the 7-8 -
James commented on the blog post 2011 Texas Football Recruiting 1 hour, 47 minutes ago
Barney Frank and Mormon quips in the same post. My Tuesday is complete.
Texas HS football is going through a phase (era?) where the best athlete talent is being put on offense. DBs aren’t being developed in vast quantities. Why wouldn’t you go after a couple OOS DBs?
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Trips Right commented on the blog post Texas Hoops vs. Kansas: Post-Mortem 1 hour, 50 minutes ago
ponderos, shouldn’t you be supersizing something somewhere?
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Trips Right commented on the blog post Texas Hoops vs. Kansas: Post-Mortem 1 hour, 51 minutes ago
Gillispie’s a mid-major clown because of his off the court indiscretions. Seriously, The University of Texas is much too high profile to risk its brand and image with this moron. And anyone that mentions Augie Garrido should be permabanned the intertubes. The situations aren’t remotely similar.
If you want to go down the
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Trips Right commented on the blog post Texas Hoops vs. Kansas: Post-Mortem 1 hour, 58 minutes ago
Leonidas, none of those points came against Dex. Boxscores aren’t reality, they’re like porn movies. If porn was real everyone would be a plummer.
As for Pittman on offense, Aldrich wasn’t playing him straight up, he was getting a double virtually everytime down. That’s not Aldrich’s fault but it’s reality.
Pittman rarely
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Mister Mike commented on the blog post Nebraska Fits the Profile of the 2010 National Champion 2 hours, 4 minutes ago
Good line. What is the thinking on his ability vs. the injury?
It’s funny you should ask. I’m working on putting something together right now that will be discussing this very topic. I know you’re waiting with bated breath for it too. Admit it.
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HenryJames said:
July 4th, 2009 at 12:00 pm
And don’t forget that Robert Earl Keen’s “Fourth of July” is a Dave Alvin cover.
Facebook User said:
July 4th, 2009 at 12:23 pm
King of California. Nice.
Bonghornfandlag said:
July 4th, 2009 at 9:11 pm
Friggin hilarious. I also loved the aggy article on “Longhorn media bias”. ROTFLMAO.
I mean seriously – it’s no wonder that his piece wasn’t open for comments.
Mr. Orange said:
July 5th, 2009 at 7:03 am
Classic. This article just made my morning. This will quickly be forwarded to all of my aggy friends.
Crazy Joe Clark said:
July 5th, 2009 at 6:16 pm
Frankly, I’m more ashamed of having attended the institution that produced Rick Perry.
Ag_in_TX said:
July 6th, 2009 at 5:14 am
Thankfully, I don’t give a fat flying rat fuck what ESPN says about damn near anything.
EyesOfTX said:
July 6th, 2009 at 5:41 am
That’s the spirit! Whoop!
RC Horn said:
July 6th, 2009 at 8:37 am
Where’s Warren Gilbert and Bum Bright when you need them? :-)
Jamdog said:
July 6th, 2009 at 9:25 am
What a turd of an article.
D. Ray Morton said:
July 6th, 2009 at 10:11 am
ESPN hates us.
Vasherized said:
July 6th, 2009 at 11:02 am
Or a Sooner. Roddick’s bro and new OU tennis coach having a mid-game snack at Wimbledon:
Ag living in the UT Golf Club of all places said:
July 7th, 2009 at 8:40 am
Sounds like he got dumped by a female Aggie. Someone is bitter. Can’t we all just get along?
Kyle said:
July 7th, 2009 at 10:15 am
There’s an old saying about the A&M-tu rivalry that goes “They look down on us and we whip their ass.” Well sir, if you ever set aside your childish insecurities that require you to base your entire self worth on the success of a few 20 year old men long enough to come out from behind that keyboard and meet me eye to eye you can attempt to look down at me while I whip yours. I’m Texas born and an Aggie by the grace of God and by God I’ll never run and hide my head in the sand when MY team is down, so everyone enjoy the laughs, and enjoy your freedom, which is in no small part due to all the AGGIES that died for YOU in war.
Thanks and Gig ‘Em
Mark said:
July 7th, 2009 at 10:32 am
And how must it feel to be writing for some obscure, off-the-wall website such as the Barking Carnival???? BWAHAHAHAHAAHAH
TaylorTRoom said:
July 7th, 2009 at 10:40 am
“enjoy your freedom, which is in no small part due to all the AGGIES that died for YOU in war.”
Kyle, I’m glad that you didn’t die in the war, while fighting for my freedom. What unit were you in?
hwood12 said:
July 7th, 2009 at 10:46 am
Was all of this noise said when A&M whipped your ass 2 yrs straight under the helm of Fran?? Now that is an embarrassment…Oh let me guess…We won due to all the “illegal hits”…MEHAHAHAHA!!
So how is Mac’s fake 2008 championship trophy looking??
Vasherized said:
July 7th, 2009 at 10:58 am
This is how it shoud be. Keep it coming Aggies.
TaylorTRoom said:
July 7th, 2009 at 10:59 am
What’s that, Kyle? You weren’t in the service? That means you are just like me- a civilian graduate of a school with an ROTC program that puts officers in the military. I went to UT, and you went to TAMU.
bucky said:
July 7th, 2009 at 11:07 am
we’re Texas Aggies now, not Texas A&M. Ags, we’ll always be able to hang our hats on those 2 seasons under the great Colonel Fran, we whipped them t sips good!
Beergut said:
July 7th, 2009 at 11:23 am
On July 4, I never once thought about the texas longhorns, but it appears you spent the whole day thinking about Texas A&M, so much so that you chose to write about it.
What does that say about you?
3rd Platoon Ag said:
July 7th, 2009 at 11:34 am
Yes, I’m not at all thankful to be an Aggie on July 4, or to have gone to a school that has produced 7 Medal of Honor winners and has commissioned literally THOUSANDS of servicemen and women, many of which who have died in service to the USA. You’re right, it’s just awful. I will only place my school’s value upon how my the football team is doing from now on, as how the folks in Austin tell us it should be.
You’re right, it’s hard being one of us.
Bunbury said:
July 7th, 2009 at 11:47 am
Somehow I ha convinced myself the ags did put lots of value on football. Come to find out it was all about medal of honor winners the whole time! Who knew?
I really thought I had them pinned down on that one…
BatesHorn said:
July 7th, 2009 at 11:58 am
Patriotism is the last refuge of the scoundrel.
-Samuel Johnson
WBBQ74 said:
July 7th, 2009 at 12:17 pm
Does the original poster have a DD214 and/or ever spent 1 DAY in uniform? Freedom, unlike website BS, isn’t free. I have said “Here” at Aggie Musters for buds of mine who died in the service of their/your country; I was lucky, never got shot at during my years of putting on the uniform. Taking time on the 4th of July to make cheap shots at Texas A&M is pretty low rent. Football comes and goes; class endures. You, sir, have none.
3rd Platoon Ag said:
July 7th, 2009 at 12:30 pm
Freedom isn’t free, but t-sip BS is.
And yes, Bunbury, we do value our teams, especially football, but fortunately for Texas A&M, we have A LOT more than just a good sports program to offer.
I also love how t-sips call us “obsessed”, when there’s crap like this out there that shows a mutual feeling, despite inherent denial. Awesome.
CPT Mike '03 said:
July 7th, 2009 at 12:44 pm
I graduated from Texas A&M University and proudly served (and continue to serve) my Country in the United States Army. I am thankful to Texas A&M for allowing me the opportunity to excel in the classroom and for helping build me into a leader of Men on the battlefield. Football is great to brag about – and each school has had moments to boast and lament its respective program – but I laughed when I read this “article” because it seeks to disparage a wide swath of fellow Texans and Americans who have served this nation bravely on a day when everyone should be remembering our fallen heroes and celebrating our Liberty.
If you want to give thanks for not attending one of Texas’ Flagship Universities, save it for Thanksgiving Day when the Ags and Horns meet on the gridiron at Kyle Field.
Gig’em and God Bless,
CPT Mike
Texas A&M ‘03 & ‘09
EyesOfTX said:
July 7th, 2009 at 12:46 pm
Boy, somebody left the gate open.
Laz said:
July 7th, 2009 at 1:26 pm
Eyes, you must have hit them pretty close to the mark to get them all riled up like that.
So many ruffled feathers…
ctex80 said:
July 7th, 2009 at 1:32 pm
Wow, Walmart must be empty right now.
LonghornLawyer said:
July 7th, 2009 at 1:41 pm
Oohhhh-yeah. That’s the spot. Right there. Keep it coming.
Vasherized said:
July 7th, 2009 at 1:52 pm
Our national defense is in peril with the Aggies so distracted about this column.
Eyes should be hearing from Homeland any time now.
Ag_in_TX said:
July 7th, 2009 at 2:04 pm
My initial response is lookin’ better all the time, eh?
Horncasting said:
July 7th, 2009 at 2:48 pm
I believe that a loss to Tick this year will even the all time series.
Bevoxii said:
July 7th, 2009 at 2:50 pm
Some of you ags just take things, and yourselves, too seriously. Thanks to all of you that served, and thanks to your university for preparing you for that service. I would be interested to find out how many of you actually go into military service after graduation in today’s world. I would contend that it is not the great number of people you want to say it is. Even still, each one should be thanked. I will admit that I don’t have a number handy myself, and a rudimentary search on google did not provide any answers that.
I guess I took a long way to basically say quit being vaginas, the author of the blog is making fun of ags in regards to sports and your lack of donating. Don’t embarrass yourselves by throwing stuff in there that has nothing to do with the topic.
BTW, I do have a DD214.
Aggie Lurking said:
July 7th, 2009 at 6:23 pm
I find it amusing that a guy making fun of “tu” and “tick” refers to us as “aggy”.
Imitation is the most sincere form of flattery. Thank you sir.
Bucktooth Longhorn said:
July 8th, 2009 at 5:10 am
At least at A&M you won’t see the dude on dude action you get at tu. Steers and queers right? Go Shlongwhorns!
If only NCAA football made my degree more prestigious…
ctex80 said:
July 8th, 2009 at 5:14 am
Bucktooth Longhorn: Thank you for confirming all my assumptions about Texas A&M University.
Bucktooth Longhorn said:
July 8th, 2009 at 5:19 am
You’re welcome, dude on dude.
bat said:
July 8th, 2009 at 5:52 am
Classic. Aggies respond by piling onto a blog post that was getting nothing.
Help! I’m talking and I can’t shut up!
HenryJames said:
July 8th, 2009 at 6:03 am
Manufactured outrage!
Vasherized said:
July 8th, 2009 at 6:16 am
Ed said:
July 8th, 2009 at 6:22 am
Wow, there’s two minutes wasted I’ll never get back. And they say Ags are obsessed about longhorns…
HenryJames said:
July 8th, 2009 at 6:26 am
Well you capitalized ‘Ags’ and not ‘longhorns’ so…
EyesOfTX said:
July 8th, 2009 at 7:38 am
These Aggies are awesome. :)
Navy Horn 16 said:
July 8th, 2009 at 7:41 am
Capt Mike
You are a big bag of douche. This article does not “seeks to disparage a wide swath of fellow Texans and Americans who have served this nation bravely”. It seeks to make fun of a bunch of jack-boot wearing dumb-asses who can’t take a joke.
OBTW, when you have to go back a half century to come up with some success of your “corps of cadets”, you might want to just let it go. Texas has their own ROTC programs that are very well run, and we don’t make our university look like a bunch of clowns on national TV every year.
Your rival status with Tech is perfect. They don’t care at all, and you obviously care WAY too much.
Enjoy the basement of the Big XII.
LT Nate
The University of Texas ‘02
EyesOfTX said:
July 8th, 2009 at 7:51 am
Aggie Lurking: I have never used the word “aggy”, in this piece or any other piece I’ve written. I consider it as stupid and 3rd grade childish as “tu” and “tick”.
You need to find something real to be “amused” about. Thanks.
ctex80 said:
July 8th, 2009 at 8:01 am
Bucktooth: You look resplendent in your homophobia.
Yassir Sanchez said:
July 8th, 2009 at 9:02 am
The agroid responses are awesome.
At fish camp they must teach this shit. Whenever someone makes fun of eAtMe talk about how aggys died for their freedom. Second of all insert homosexuality in the debate. All the time keep stating that anm has the greatest, most loyal, patriotic, apple pie eating, fans in the world. Everyone who does not go to the Dixie Chicken once a day is jealous of all those who do.
You people are a cariacture, based on a myth.
The one thing fans of Baylor, Tech, Texas, and even OU for crying out loud is that aggies are a fucking joke.
Eskimohorn said:
July 8th, 2009 at 9:19 am
Pretend Army.
BatesHorn said:
July 8th, 2009 at 10:09 am
You know, if you guys spent as much time cutting checks to your school as you do getting angry at us, you might not find your school so short in the fundraising department.
Bucktooth Longhorn said:
July 8th, 2009 at 10:14 am
I think most of us Ags are having fun with this. For a guy that claims Aggies or “Aggys” or whatever mean nothing to him, you just wrote an 11-paragraph essay (no I’m not counting the Hook ‘Em as a paragraph, so feel free to refrain from the Aggie math jokes)!
An 11 paragraph essay, now that’s obsession. What, you couldn’t get into A&M’s engineering school and had to settle for tu?
EyesOfTX said:
July 8th, 2009 at 10:23 am
That 11 paragraph essay took me about 30 minutes to hammer out at 7:00 on a beautiful Saturday morning. I spent more time sitting on the toilet that day than I did writing this, and no one accused me of being obsessed with taking a crap. I spent more time watering my lawn, and no one accused me of being obsessed with my garden hose. I spent more time cooking up burgers and hot dogs that day, and no one accused me of being obsessed with my gas grill.
As with everything else, Aggies seem to have an odd sense of what qualifies as an “obsession”. :)
HenryJames said:
July 8th, 2009 at 10:28 am
I think Bucktooth is obsessed with your ‘garden hose.’
Bucktooth said:
July 8th, 2009 at 10:37 am
I ain’t no fag, man. That’s you whorns that are steers or queers. Or something else that is equally gay also, hippie austin homos.
HenryJames said:
July 8th, 2009 at 10:46 am
You’re so far in the closet you’re finding Christmas presents.
Old Army said:
July 8th, 2009 at 10:47 am
Aggies aren’t happy unless another aggie is gloriously dying
Vasherized said:
July 8th, 2009 at 11:46 am
ponderos said:
July 8th, 2009 at 11:54 am
I didn’t know cake decorating was part of the Animal Husbandry curriculum. I really don’t think I want to know how it applies, either.
Bateshorn said:
July 8th, 2009 at 12:04 pm
Somehow this post has managed to outdo even ipowers. Kudos, Eyes.
Blueshorn said:
July 8th, 2009 at 12:20 pm
Kyle, I’m glad that you didn’t die in the war, while fighting for my freedom. What unit were you in?
{{{{{ C R I C K E T S }}}}}
atexasex said:
July 8th, 2009 at 12:58 pm
CAPT Mike,
I spent 23 years in the U.S. Navy, retiring as a CDR. During that time, I had the occasion to meet a host of Aggie service members. Except for one notable exception (and he was still a seriously demented Corps-turd) they were, complete, total dickwad, Neidermeyer types who were roundly laughed at and ridiculed behind their backs by their officer peers and enlisted sailors alike. Standards must have fallen significantly since the glory days of WW II, I guess.
Hook’em!
CDR USN (Ret)
Arrogant TEXAS Fan said:
July 8th, 2009 at 1:47 pm
Captain Mike would prefer it that we only make fun of the poor old aggies at Thanksgiving.
I’m good with that. They’ll have plenty of shit to take from Tech and Baylor until then.
It’s a pretty damned one-sided fun-fest between the ags and horns anyway. As an ag pointed out to me, though . . . they did win three national championships this year. He couldn’t recall what sports they were in.
So there.
uthookem said:
July 8th, 2009 at 2:01 pm
This is great stuff. It does remind me of the sign I saw at last year’s football game:
“Thankful I’m not an Aggie.”
Oh, so true.
Hook ‘em!
Texoz said:
July 8th, 2009 at 2:46 pm
I’m looking forward to other editions of this thread:
On This Halloween Eve, Thank God You’re Not a OSU Cowboy (UT football is gonna kick your ass today)
On This Thanksgiving Day, Thank God You’re Not a Sooner (who carves the turkey, your sistermomma or uncledaddy?)
On This New Year’s Day, Thank God You’re Not a Baylor Bear (no booze)
On This Valetine’s Day, Thank God You’re Not a Red Raider (you’ll never get any love from the BCS)
On This Easter Day, Thank God You’re Not a Cornhusker (your program will never be resurrected)
The General said:
July 8th, 2009 at 2:51 pm
On This Halloween Eve, Thank God You’re Not a OSU Cowboy (UT football is gonna kick your ass today)
I predict UT will lose this game by two touchdowns.
Is that a big enough reverse jinx?
thumper360 said:
July 8th, 2009 at 4:07 pm
Guess my service in the Vietnam war doesn’t count but then …it never did.
Your pal thumper…USAF
UT Class of 1965
EyesOfTX said:
July 8th, 2009 at 4:12 pm
TexOz – thanks very much for the ideas for future contributions to Barking Carnival. I’m taking notes. :)
Eskimohorn said:
July 8th, 2009 at 5:41 pm
Guess my service at Camp Strake don’t count neither. The Cub Scouts prepare soldiers to fight, too!
Webelo Class of 1983
Bucktooth Longhorn said:
July 8th, 2009 at 9:39 pm
Congratulations, your school is really good at a collegiate-level sport. If I were in your shoes, I would start a blog and write 11 paragraph essays too–not that an 11 paragraph essay is longer or more significant than taking a dump (of course).
EyesOfTX said:
July 9th, 2009 at 3:11 am
I know that 11 paragraphs of properly structured English grammar would constitute an unrivaled work of literary accomplishment at A&M, but it’s really not all that big a deal. :)
SoonerJ said:
July 9th, 2009 at 5:37 am
If A&M is not your rival…. why do YOU care?
Looks like a pretty deep rivalry to me.
Eskimohorn said:
July 9th, 2009 at 5:44 am
A&M provides us with unrivaled humor value.
Trips Right said:
July 9th, 2009 at 6:29 am
I carefully linked and constructed a 3 sentence blurb about Mexican midget wrestlers. I’m obsessed. I need help.
Orangeblood said:
July 9th, 2009 at 8:14 am
(Sitting on the toilet…)
“Contemplate my shit, or write about Aggy.”
Six in one hand, half dozen in the other.
MIA said:
July 9th, 2009 at 8:52 am
To aggies anytime a writer uses multi syllable expressions it must mean he is obsessed to have put so much thought into the article. Come on they are used to Battalion tripe, and love poems scrawled on bathroom stalls.
Faggy Assball's latest incarnation said:
July 9th, 2009 at 1:45 pm
You guys are awesome. I can’t tell you the number of times I’ve been out with my Aggie hat on and had “longhorns” running their mouths about how great their football team is, all while they’re sacking my groceries or stocking shelves at Wal-Mart. Congrats, your football team is better. You also make an order of magnitude less money than me, but at least your football team is better right?
And you guys really think Aggies sit around worrying about our football team or how we’re going to beat Texas 24/7, or what some longhorn t-shirt fan happened to say in a public forum. We’re too busy making money with our real degrees to worry about some frat boy 1.5 GPA business major turned blogger perez hilton wannabe.
Bringin’ back the hate!
bucky said:
July 9th, 2009 at 1:59 pm
What I don’t get is why us ags can’t only have 1 A&M sticker on our cars. It’s bad enough we buy maroon cars/trucks, but then to stick 3 to 4 stickers on there? gooooolllly.
BrickHorn said:
July 9th, 2009 at 2:02 pm
We’re too busy making money with our real degrees
In exactly what high earning-potential profession does an A&M degree carry more prestige than a similar degree from Texas?
IP Address 72.177.6.228 said:
July 9th, 2009 at 3:46 pm
Haha I love it, the 2009 Annual Texas University Rupaul Jackoff Contest winner that runs this blog actually couldn’t take the heat, so he had to resort to changing my name to “Faggy Assball.” It’s okay, the more you try to get one up on me, the more you show just how much this all bothers you.
Admit it, you hate us, and you can’t sleep at night because we exist, and because we gather attention away from your beloved university because half the people in this state (the normal ones) call themselves Aggies, and the other half brag about winning the “who can deep throat a pickle” contest back in the t.u. frat house on stay-at-home-with-your-buddies night.
MIA said:
July 9th, 2009 at 3:55 pm
You aggroids just don’t get it. You guys are truly the gift that keeps on giving, and you are too damn stupid to realize it.
Could you ignore your favorite comedian if he was on stage right in front of you?
That’s what the aggies are to us and the rest of the world: a big effing joke, and we can’t get enough. Ask Longhorn Lawyer, he is one as addicted to your misery as Whitney Houston to crack.
When people visit here from out of state I invariably have to explain the aggies, and their twisted behavior.
You call your cult of group think “normal”.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAH!
I could go on, but I wouldn’t want you ags to think I was obsessed because of my sentence structure.
the Bobs said:
July 9th, 2009 at 5:25 pm
“half the people in this state (the normal ones) call themselves Aggies”
well, let’s see… a certain percentage of the state prefer Tech, Houston, TCU, SMU, Baylor… and I’m not even into the smaller schools yet. So, let’s say all the ACU, and Texas State, etc. fans make up, what, at least some percentage, and the other Div 1 schools certainly make up another big chunk of that percentage, and, of course, a whole entire 50% is normal and aggie… how the hell do we keep seeing Texas shirts and caps all over the place????? Are we busing these people in??? I’m certainly confused, but, although completely hetero, I’m assuming that bucktooth can explain that phenomenon in a way that will enlighten, or at least amuse me…
Facebook User said:
July 9th, 2009 at 6:32 pm
As HenryJjames favorite author said, I have come to believe that the whole world is an enigma, a harmless enigma that is made terrible by our own mad attempt to interpret it as though it had an underlying truth.
Anyway, this shit is so predictably boring I may have to get my toffee hammer back from Dieter.
That said, EnglishAg and Ag_in_Tx have taken over Spence Park Soapbox. I think the Ags will enjoy that site. Not sure if Doc or The Mayor will return. The blogosphere does require a second skin.
HenryJames said:
July 9th, 2009 at 6:34 pm
Spence Park Soapbox? Sounds like a gay bar in Raymondville.
Facebook User said:
July 9th, 2009 at 6:51 pm
Oh man, that was quick.
Captain Obvious said:
July 12th, 2009 at 3:58 pm
Anyone happen to catch Loren Steffy’s article today in the Houston Chronicle about Texas A&M, our beloved Governor Perry, and the Texas Enterprise Fund?
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