Articles
Golf is the new football
Posted by HenryJames on July 2nd, 2009 under Uncategorized
I’ve never played a round of golf. I’ve never even played a hole of golf. I grew up literally two blocks from a public course, but I never set foot on it other than to fish and catch frogs in its pond. I don’t watch golf either. I don’t even read about golf.
But I do know that golf is not football. Not in Texas. Not ever.
So I’m reading a column by what I assume is some kid’s toy airplane named Robert Cessna. It (he?) writes for AggieSports.com and poorly.
Now when you see shit like “It ended with Texas unable to win the national championship in baseball, even though it was seeded first and given a cakewalk to Omaha” and “The Texas football team had to settle for a Fiesta Bowl victory over Ohio State”, you know you’re in for a fight just to finish reading the article. But I soldiered on. Valiantly. Because that’s what Billy Mays would have wanted.
The point of the article is to say that A&M’s athletic program is close to being on par with the program at Texas. I think. How? Because their golf team is good.
Winning national championships in men’s golf and men’s track will end that. Think of all the golfers playing gin rummy in the state’s elite country clubs or just a few guys belting down a couple of beers after playing a public course, they’ll be talking about what the Aggies did.
Again, I’ve never played a round of golf so I don’t know what people talk about after they play. But I do know what they don’t talk about. College golf. How do I know this? Because no one fucking talks about college golf.
Men respect guys who can belt the golf ball 300 yards and win. That’s what the Aggies did.
Is that a long ways? Doesn’t matter because the swing is controlled by physics. And not cool physics like Newton’s second law but physics that Huckleberry would put on an Excel spreadsheet. He plays golf.
No matter what any golf prick tells you, golf isn’t macho. And no matter what any Aggie sportswriter tells you, it isn’t football.
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Activity
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D W commented on the blog post March Madness open thread 15 minutes ago
Now Baylor talking trash to the #14 seed players. Seriously?
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ghostofagroundgame commented on the blog post March Madness Open thread 18 minutes ago
If Sam Houston State wins then Rick Barnes will have trick-fucked me in a completely unexpected way. I figured if Baylor beat us like a drum three time then should be able to ease past Sam Houston State. I did not know about the Rec Specs.
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gingerballs commented on the blog post Big Dance: Day One 21 minutes ago
Sam Houston attempting to one up Murray St.
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gingerballs commented on the blog post Big Dance: Day One 23 minutes ago
WOW, way to shit the bed Stallings….again
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Triston27 commented on the blog post Big Dance: Day One 25 minutes ago
Wow. Fortunately I had Vandy losing Saturday anyway.
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gingerballs commented on the blog post Big Dance: Day One 31 minutes ago
Murray….present!
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CloseToJumping commented on the blog post March Madness open thread 37 minutes ago
If Baylor fails, my grand scheme of Purdue playing for it all will immediately begin to take shape.
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ghostofagroundgame commented on the blog post Beat the Barkers NCAA Tourney Bracket 41 minutes ago
Freaking BYU.
Otherwise, I’m 2-1.
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CloseToJumping commented on the blog post Beat the Barkers NCAA Tourney Bracket 48 minutes ago
Yeah, that Purdue pick was awesome. It seems like I heard something about them having injuries, but it slipped my mind when making picks. I’ve literally not seen them play for one second this season. Not a highlight, nothing. Good work.
1-2 to start things off, I think it’s clear I’m going to own this thing.
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ghostofagroundgame commented on the blog post March Madness Open thread 1 hour, 26 minutes ago
Man, Sam Houston State is playing Baylor perfectly. Rec Specs is running the paint. And I always love teams with short guys who jack threes.
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ghostofagroundgame commented on the blog post March Madness Open thread 1 hour, 39 minutes ago
And they have a dude with rec specs.
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Trips Right commented on the blog post March Madness Open thread 1 hour, 39 minutes ago
Sam Houston State with a triangle and two to stifle Baylor. I’m going to vomit
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ghostofagroundgame commented on the blog post March Madness Open thread 1 hour, 39 minutes ago
Sam Houston State is like Tom Penders’ wet dream.
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Art Vandelay commented on the blog post March Madness Open thread 1 hour, 41 minutes ago
MMOD is beating me down with the Ivan brothers.
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ghostofagroundgame commented on the blog post March Madness open thread 1 hour, 41 minutes ago
ND proved that the old tried and true, anti-Duke theory about how teams that rely on unathletic white dudes who have to get to the foul line and/or make a alot of really ugly right-handed layups never win in the tourney.
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ghostofagroundgame commented on the blog post March Madness open thread 1 hour, 42 minutes ago
Man, I can’t believe that Florida game. Their team actually appears to be DUMBER than ours.
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Vasherized commented on the blog post March Madness Open thread 1 hour, 44 minutes ago
We need to send our guys to Baylor’s School of Hard Dunks.
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Triston27 commented on the blog post Big Dance: Day One 1 hour, 47 minutes ago
Dollar $igns!
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Art Vandelay commented on the blog post March Madness open thread 1 hour, 50 minutes ago
Great start to the tourney. Two OT games and a one point ND loss.
Yeah – a bunch of half ass bowl games is a much better idea.
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uthookem commented on the blog post March Madness open thread 1 hour, 51 minutes ago
I think Sam Houston has taken more charges in the first ten minutes than Texas took all season.
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Trips Right commented on the blog post March Madness Open thread 1 hour, 53 minutes ago
Morris goes down.
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Trips Right commented on the blog post March Madness Open thread 1 hour, 56 minutes ago
Big 3 by morris down 1 with 8 seconds
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Vasherized commented on the blog post March Madness Open thread 1 hour, 56 minutes ago
Dude hit the easy layup.
/facepalm
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Trips Right commented on the blog post March Madness Open thread 1 hour, 58 minutes ago
Morris down 3 with 29
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Vasherized commented on the blog post March Madness Open thread 1 hour, 59 minutes ago
UDOH SWAT GAME ON!
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Triston27 commented on the blog post Big Dance: Day One 1 hour, 59 minutes ago
1-point game with just 30 seconds left
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Triston27 commented on the blog post Big Dance: Day One 1 hour, 59 minutes ago
1-point game with just 3 seconds left
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Trips Right commented on the blog post March Madness Open thread 2 hours ago
Morris down one even after getting hosed on a jump ball call. 35 to go
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Trips Right commented on the blog post March Madness Open thread 2 hours, 4 minutes ago
Morris down six with a minute left. They’re done.
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Trips Right commented on the blog post March Madness Open thread 2 hours, 6 minutes ago
Baylor looks like a final four team
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Vasherized said:
July 2nd, 2009 at 9:08 am
I guess you didn’t get the flyer about the BC “sales rally” in August at Barton Creek?
Bring your concho belt.
Scipio Tex said:
July 2nd, 2009 at 9:14 am
Funny stuff. I would venture that most Aggies were fairly embarrassed by that article as well.
Chooky said:
July 2nd, 2009 at 9:19 am
Walking off of the field of a high profile bowl game with a victory over the Ohio State Buckeyes is something the Aggies are way too proud to do.
Doperbo said:
July 2nd, 2009 at 9:24 am
“Bring your concho belt.”
Singling out srr50 is cold man.
Judge Smails wants to talk to you HJ.
Vasherized said:
July 2nd, 2009 at 9:36 am
Some choice excerpts from the comments section:
YOU ARE RIGHT ABOUT THAT. a&m HAS A WORLD CLASS FACILITIES BUT LACK WITH ACADEMIC RECOGNITION(S). tu IS ONE OF THE TOP WHEN IT COMES TO ENDOWMENTS. LAST I READ IT WAS HARVARD, PRINCETON, DUKE, UCLA, TEXAS AND NORTH CAROLINA. I WAS LOOKING FOR A&M IN THE RANKINGS…I THINK IT WAS WAY BELOW TOP 15 OR 25. I WAS WONDERING IF ITS GEOGRAPHIC SINCE NOTHING REALLY IS GOING ON IN THIS TOWN.
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WHAT IS THE LAST THING I WOULD LIKE TO SAY TO FRIEND SHERMAN TODAY?
This security guard will give you a half hour to pack your office, and escort you off campus.
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Follow me on Twitter.com!
Just search for “Baylor is A&M’s Daddy!”
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Why dont kids want to come here? We were told when sherman took over that they would flock in because he had the whole nfl on speed dial.
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I was going over the Rivals Top 100 recruits through the years, and noticed few if any make it to an NFL roster. Actually very few seem to even make an impact in college. Of the 300 players selected as the top 100 recruits coming out of high school between 2002-2004, I am only seeing 2 Potential NFL Hall of Famers, Haloti Ngata (#2 in 2002), Adriane Peterson (#1 in 2004). Still too early to comment on guys from the Rivals 2005 class. So what’s my point? Point is don’t get too happy if your school got a “good” recruiting class, it does not mean jack.
Take that Liucci!
Chooky said:
July 2nd, 2009 at 9:37 am
I’d venture that many Aggies aren’t embarrassed by that article at all.
I’d also venture that some of them are currently sculpting Cessna’s likeness out of Spam.
Stuck in MN said:
July 2nd, 2009 at 9:50 am
I do agree that the number of NFL hall of famers is the most accurate way to measure a recruiting class. Further proof of the suck that was our 2002 class.
Nordberg said:
July 2nd, 2009 at 10:00 am
It’s all just a big coincidence that USC, Florida, Texas, OU, and Ohio St. all dominate the recruiting rankings every year. Big total fucking gigantic coincidence.
Stiff Shaft said:
July 2nd, 2009 at 10:01 am
If you win a National Championship in front of 25 yawning spectators, does it really count?
Huckleberry said:
July 2nd, 2009 at 10:43 am
300 yards is definitely a long way. Of course, I pounded a drive around 320 yards on an uphill hole just this last Saturday with no wind to speak of. Just crushed it. Because I’m macho. It was definitely way better than winning a BCS bowl against Ohio State would have been. Trust me.
srr50 said:
July 2nd, 2009 at 10:46 am
Speaking as the official Golf Prick of BC I don’t give a Rat’s Ass who won the NCAA title, nor would I spend one split second being shamed over the fact that the Aggies won.
Jealousy is such a petty human emotion Vasherized
Vasherized said:
July 2nd, 2009 at 11:14 am
BIG STICK!
bizzle said:
July 2nd, 2009 at 11:56 am
I’d say none of us are embarrassed.
In fact, I’m currently brushing my teeth in the reflection of the solid-gold lone star showdown replica trophy I have on display in my bedroom.
Feel free to meet me at Dallas National at 3:45 this afternoon and we’ll talk some serious college golf.
Tackchevy said:
July 2nd, 2009 at 12:00 pm
That article is one of the finest examples of Aggy motivation and Aggy logic that I have ever seen.
BrickHorn said:
July 2nd, 2009 at 12:10 pm
Again, I’ve never played a round of golf so I don’t know what people talk about after they play. But I do know what they don’t talk about. College golf.
I don’t know about golf, but I can defintely confirm that people talk about college meat judging after playing a friendly round of meat judging.
South '06 said:
July 2nd, 2009 at 12:12 pm
Again, example of why I get pissed at myself for ever coming to this site.
So for the 938370112th time, phrases like “typical Aggie” or “every Aggie” are completely ridiculous considering the scope of the number of people you are talking about.
And everyone I know is PROFOUNDLY aware that nobody gives a damn about NCAA Golf, but what do you want the writers to do? Not mention it?
Barking Carnival, home of “typical Longhorn” elitism.
HenryJames said:
July 2nd, 2009 at 12:14 pm
Your response is typical of every Aggie.
The General said:
July 2nd, 2009 at 12:37 pm
Of all the isms, I think the negative connotation of elitism is the one I find most puzzling.
Anyway, I’ll take it.
Huckleberry said:
July 2nd, 2009 at 12:52 pm
Typical Aggie. Doesn’t even know what “typical” means.
And, for the record, I don’t care if the writers mention it. Did you read the link? It is a typical Cessna piece, i.e., terribly written and uninformative. Typical meaning that it exhibits the standard characteristics of his columns, not that every single column he ever writes is necessarily like that one. But anyway.
I’ve played multiple rounds since the Aggies won the national championship. Three times I’ve had a beer after the round with my fellow golfers. Twice there were Aggies there (t-shirt Aggies, in fact). Not once was the NCAA golf title mentioned. Every time football was mentioned.
I’m pretty sure that was HJ’s point.
kevwun said:
July 2nd, 2009 at 1:18 pm
Not that I condone elitism, or any -ism for that matter. -Ism’s in my opinion are not good. A person should not believe in an -ism, he should believe in himself. I quote Mike Sherman, “I don’t believe in Collies, I just believe in me.” Good point there. After all, he was the Sherminator. I could be the Sherminator. I’d still have to bum rides off people.
srr50 said:
July 2nd, 2009 at 1:21 pm
I’ve played multiple rounds since the Aggies won the national championship. Three times I’ve had a beer after the round with my fellow golfers. Twice there were Aggies there (t-shirt Aggies, in fact).
Typical Aggie shows up at a golf course in a t-shirt instead of a collared shirt
bighornfan32 said:
July 2nd, 2009 at 1:55 pm
I talk about football when I play golf. Also, boobs.
Trips Right said:
July 2nd, 2009 at 2:12 pm
Some jerkoff aggie told my wife that there are strippers on the golf course. First ipowers and now this shit. I’m going to have to do like CTJ and take up cock fighting.
Minnesotahorn said:
July 2nd, 2009 at 3:51 pm
Well played kevwun.
dedfischer said:
July 6th, 2009 at 4:23 am
Fucking golf pricks. They’ve now spawned a super-hybrid GP. A whole new generation of Aggie GP’s. Watch this, in 15 years, no one will be playing golf.