Football Articles
No, it’s not the Stanley cup finals. Though if you think about it, The Narcoleptics would be an awesome name for a hockey team. Maybe put then in Nassau for the alliteration. Or Nashville. In fact if you fielded an entire team of narcoleptics I’d probably pay to watch hockey. The occasional random syncopal episode and ensuing ruckus of crashing bodies, flailing sticks, and mullets all-akimbo would certainly heighten the intensity. What are we talking about?
Anyway, Leach and Sherm are at it again.
I actually forgot what round this is, but it doesn’t really matter. My son thinks twelveteen is a number, so let’s call it round twelveteen. Blends well with the other myriad pieces of absurdity in this particular imbroglio. We have anonymous sources that confirm it began with a fight over L.A. Law vs. Mama’s Family during a break at the Big12 coaching convention, but the rest is pure conjecture on our part. These sources also hint at the existence of HenryJames’ girlfriend, which as yet remains unverified.
An excerpt.
“I’ve always said that it is truly exciting to play Texas A&M – the quality of coaches they have, the great team and great tradition and, above all, the quality of players they have,” Leach continued. “I’ve always known A&M had great players. The fact that they have the luxury to put a third- or fourth-round draft pick on the bench, to me, identifies what a truly great team they are.
“It’s an honor for us at Texas Tech to have the opportunity to play them. There are numerous players on our team that will never get a look or play a down in the NFL, so you can imagine how exciting it is for me and them to go play a team the magnitude of Texas A&M and look over there on the bench and see third- and fourth-round draft picks.”
The more astute of you may have noticed a hint of sarcasm there. The truly erudite started reading it in Mark Antony’s voice about a third the way through (Julius Caesar: Act 3, Scene 2). For those of you who read it in Jar Jar Binks voice (we have a wide demographic), I agree with you, it’s hard to tell whether he’s being complimentary or not.
Now, I’m not here to say who’s right and who’s wrong. That’s for the radical muslims to decide. I’m a live and let live kinda guy. I do think Leach is funny, if clinically insane, and his petty attention-seeking antics amuse me. On the other hand I see the Aggies point (I can’t believe I just typed that: I think my bladder let go, holy shit); in that Leach crosses a line when he calls out a specific player on the Aggie roster. Just because you are one of the two men in the universe surprised by Harrell’s draft status does not give you the right to call out McGee. On the other hand, McGee was a fairly large tool the last time we saw him, so maybe there are extenuating circumstances. Judges?
In any event I’m interested in the consensus here. I’ll take what we decide and draft a formal letter of designation for Coach Leach and have dedfischer leave it in his rollerblade locker next week.
Mike Leach, we at the presitigous award winning blog Barking Carnival, after careful thought and consideration, officially designate you:
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1. A petulant whiny bitch
2. A brilliant, unafraid, courageous offensive genius
3. An amusing crazy person we enjoy viewing from several hundred miles away, in fact go on and move to Arizona for awhile, that’s better
4. A victim of the ‘People who actually teach their quarterbacks to drop back one weekend” establishment
5. A beowulf.
Some of those might cross the line, so we’ll either plant it anonymously or tone it down a little, whichever is easiest.
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Activity
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whiskey commented on the blog post Chalk Talk: The ND 3-4 Transition Part II- Defensive Line 29 minutes ago
LB Coach right before we moved over here usmc53 left the below question for you in response to one of your comments. Based on this post I take it the NT is just reading the Center’s head after the snap. I thought he asked a great question though and didn’t want it to
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Phenomenal Smith commented on the blog post First Round: Clemson Tigers 40 minutes ago
I agree that the Tigers will win.
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whiskey commented on the blog post Chalk Talk: The ND 3-4 Transition Part I- Expectations 43 minutes ago
I am starting to feel progressivley optomistic. Hopefully we can glean some discernable info about how this transition is going during spring practice. Valpodoc, glad to see you are still with us here at the new place. Your comments always add to the quality of the discussion.
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Phenomenal Smith commented on the blog post Chase Daniel makes The Economist 43 minutes ago
Well, here at AT we talk about Chase Daniel coming back to Mizzou to coach QBs and recruit the Dallas area. We haven’t taken it off the table, but not sure it carries much predictive value on our table.
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Ibas water bottle commented on the blog post Oklahoma Sooners – Recruiting So Far 53 minutes ago
Oklahoma sports media coverage is slanted towards OU? I refuse to believe Dean Blevins would do that.
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Ibas water bottle wrote a new blog post: NCAA tournament day two 1 hour, 26 minutes ago
If we can stop Stephon Marbury from eating the rest of the Vaseline we have a chance.
Peter Graves has more life than my bracket. I pick games like Gary Johnson shoots free throws. Nebraska is better off in the standings than I am in the bracket contest. Get the point? Yesterday was one of
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GoHornsGo90 commented on the blog post Texas Hoops vs. Wake Forest Open thread 6 hours, 6 minutes ago
Barnes’ three “strengths”:
Defense, rebounding, recruiting.
This team just proved the first two are non-existent (out-rebounded by 25; fucking KIDDING me?) and the last one is over-hyped as well. Every ESPN basketball recruiting analyst who actually had Bradley ahead of Wall should be taken out back and executed Inglourious Basterds style.
I hate Turgeon and I
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skymonkeyhorn commented on the blog post Texas Hoops vs. Wake Forest Open thread 6 hours, 51 minutes ago
a Good System will usually beat a talented team that does not play together and are thinking instead of playing basketball ,over a season the system wins more then they will give away.
A team that is scared to make a mistake and thinks before they react is going to lose to a confident but -
Patrick Bateman commented on the blog post Texas Hoops vs. Wake Forest Open thread 8 hours, 24 minutes ago
Nordberg,
Ironic indeed……teachable moment, I guess….
NY Horn,
I hope your drunk, because Izzo ain’t coming to Texas……Why don’t we just get Coach K. I mean Coach G came from Duke, they have to be dying to get out of Durham….
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Trips Right commented on the blog post Texas Hoops vs. Wake Forest Open thread 8 hours, 28 minutes ago
Egg, that’s fine, but at what point do you blame Barnes? Seriously, man. You’ve thrown players under the bus left and right, but at a certain point, doesn’t the buck stop somewhere. I know you’re more of an NBA guy so it begins and ends with players there, but we need fucking
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Trips Right commented on the blog post Texas Hoops vs. Wake Forest Open thread 8 hours, 28 minutes ago
Egg, that’s fine, but at what point do you blame Barnes? Seriously, man. You’ve thrown players under the bus left and right, but at a certain point, doesn’t the buck stop somewhere. I know you’re more of an NBA guy so it begins and ends with players there, but we need fucking
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Patrick Bateman commented on the blog post Texas Hoops vs. Wake Forest Open thread 8 hours, 30 minutes ago
Trips,
I hear ya. I’m frustrated as well. I guess I just don’t prescribe to such a black and white characterization of the situation. I do know that no matter what happened in the huddle, JCB made a dumb play. If Rick didn’t explain or remind him of the situation, then I
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Trips Right commented on the blog post Texas Hoops vs. Wake Forest Open thread 8 hours, 38 minutes ago
Pat, know I don’t, but I’ve had coaches draw up plays to free up the best foul shooter and then tell that guy they’d put their foot up his ass if they passed the ball. It’s funny, but as a fans of football we nitpick blitz pickup and shit like that. Shit that’s
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Trips Right commented on the blog post Texas Hoops vs. Wake Forest Open thread 8 hours, 38 minutes ago
Pat, you know I don’t, but I’ve had coaches draw up plays to free up the best foul shooter and then tell that guy they’d put their foot up his ass if they passed the ball. It’s funny, but as a fans of football we nitpick blitz pickup and shit like that. Shit
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Trips Right commented on the blog post Texas Hoops vs. Wake Forest Open thread 8 hours, 38 minutes ago
Pat, you know I don’t, but I’ve had coaches draw up plays to free up the best foul shooter and then tell that guy they’d put their foot up his ass if they passed the ball. It’s funny, but as fans of football we nitpick blitz pickup and shit like that. Shit that’s
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Patrick Bateman commented on the blog post Texas Hoops vs. Wake Forest Open thread 8 hours, 40 minutes ago
Shitty season…..Rick needs to hire some offensive help and someone needs to say it to him. Deloss?
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Patrick Bateman commented on the blog post Texas Hoops vs. Wake Forest Open thread 8 hours, 42 minutes ago
Trips,
Do you know that he didn’t? JCB has made bad decision all season, why would this be any different. Barnes coached a shitastic game, but on the teams I was the best FT shooter, I never game up the ball unless it was an uncontested layup…..It’s not hard and it doesn’t take a
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Trips Right commented on the blog post Texas Hoops vs. Wake Forest Open thread 8 hours, 43 minutes ago
mcpayne, yes, you don’t leave that shit to chance. You don’t let your guys break the huddle or dead ball not knowing precisely what’s expected from them. Barnes doesn’t get 2 mil for coaching PE where he’s hoping the right guy gets fouled.
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uthookem commented on the blog post Texas Hoops vs. Wake Forest Open thread 8 hours, 44 minutes ago
mpayne, I’d agree with you if J’Covan had been playing all season and had been in situations to make that decision. Like, you know, against Baylor, when he played all of 3 fucking minutes thanks to rick.
So yes, it is rick’s fault.
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Trips Right commented on the blog post Texas Hoops vs. Wake Forest Open thread 8 hours, 45 minutes ago
With 15 seconds left, out of a dead ball, most coaches would make it perfectly clear who they wanted to be fouled.
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uthookem commented on the blog post Texas Hoops vs. Wake Forest Open thread 8 hours, 48 minutes ago
Stupid decisions by Brown are one of the reasons he sat on the bench for most of the season…lack of coaching maybe, or just a lack of basketball IQ?
Oh well, if Brown doesn’t go off in the 2nd half, we aren’t even playing in OT. Too bad he didn’t get much of a chance
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Trips Right commented on the blog post Texas Hoops vs. Wake Forest Open thread 8 hours, 48 minutes ago
Pat, if you were making 2 million a year, would you leave that up to chance?
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Patrick Bateman commented on the blog post Texas Hoops vs. Wake Forest Open thread 8 hours, 49 minutes ago
Actually, if your a PG and the best FT shooter on the team and played basketball your entire life, you’d pretty much know not to give up the ball if you had any brains…..Such a dumb play…..
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D W commented on the blog post Texas Hoops vs. Wake Forest Open thread 8 hours, 50 minutes ago
Oh, and a stupid decision by Brown in giving up the ball to Johnson.
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Trips Right commented on the blog post Texas Hoops vs. Wake Forest Open thread 8 hours, 50 minutes ago
Be nice if we’d coached our 90 percent foul shooter not to give the ball up.
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Patrick Bateman commented on the blog post Texas Hoops vs. Wake Forest Open thread 8 hours, 50 minutes ago
Ransom,
1 for 2, that was not shitty defense……
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Mister Mike commented on the blog post State of the Union – NU Basketball, Part 1 (or Why We Are Where We Are) 8 hours, 51 minutes ago
Well if you had read it all the way, you would’ve noticed this little tidbit:
In the second part I’ll do my best to give an outline of what exactly is wrong with the program, what we can do to fix it, and then what will probably happen TO fix it.
So to answer your question:
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uthookem commented on the blog post Texas Hoops vs. Wake Forest Open thread 8 hours, 51 minutes ago
The line kills us, as it should have.
Fuck Rick Barnes, as this was the worst coaching I have seen in all my years of watching UT sports.
This saved us from Kentucky, but I feel bad for Damo, he was a hell of a Longhorn.
Hook ‘em!
And FUCK RICK BARNES!
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Patrick Bateman commented on the blog post Texas Hoops vs. Wake Forest Open thread 8 hours, 51 minutes ago
Feel bad for Damion…..Dexter and Mason, not so much….
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D W commented on the blog post Texas Hoops vs. Wake Forest Open thread 8 hours, 51 minutes ago
So the season ends with missed free throws and shitty defense by Bradley. Pretty fitting.
Orangeblood said:
May 1st, 2009 at 7:50 am
Is it stuff like this that makes the State Dept. designate us as a whole other country?
Nordberg said:
May 1st, 2009 at 8:08 am
Fuck ‘em, they’re aggies. Everything’s on the table. Go Leach.
Parlin Hall said:
May 1st, 2009 at 8:25 am
Like every masterful public speaker, Leach realizes that when a joke bombs, you just tell it over again in slightly different words.
Barking Cornhole said:
May 1st, 2009 at 8:27 am
The leader of the Llano Estacado Ass Pirates brings great joy into an otherwise drab and boring offseason. I salute you, Captain Leach, you pirate-lovin’-roller-bladin’-aggy-hatin’-crazy-motherfuckin’-madman!!!
Outback said:
May 1st, 2009 at 8:28 am
Equal parts #2 – #5. And what Nordberg said.
BrickHorn said:
May 1st, 2009 at 8:31 am
I love it. Aggy continues to believe we give a shit about them and to deny its rivalry with Tech. Then Tech goes and beats those fuckers silly every damned year, and their coach and fanbase rub salt in the wounds in with verbal barbs and impromptu 19th-century battle reenactments.
Texas and OU tossed Aggy off of its decade-long pedestal of dominance nearly 10 years ago ago. Since that time, Tech mercilessly knocked A&M out of 3rd place status and has been bullying the once-proud Ags ever since. In the meantime, OSU zipped past Aggy into the ranks of the conference and national elite. A&M now fights it out with Baylor for 5th place in the division, takes annual ass-whippings from everyone else and then has to bear the insult of Texas Tech’s relentless taunting.
Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
Ag_in_TX said:
May 1st, 2009 at 8:31 am
Leach is just a douche bag. He ought to let it go – but NOOOOOOOO, he has to get the last word in. All because he gots his wittle feewings in a tuff after the NFL said “NO SOUP FOR YOU” to his great QB.
F ‘em.
Riddle me this, Batman – offensive genius off of Stoops’ staff goes to traditionally mediocre program, builds them into a national power with a high octane offense, and….
This is the point where the coach is rewarded at Enormous State U with a chest full of gold and all the codes he can eat, right?
So, why is Leach still in Lubbock?
Oh, right – he’s an ass clown.
BrickHorn said:
May 1st, 2009 at 8:38 am
He’s an ass clown that is 6-1 against the Fightin’ Texas Aggies.
Ag_in_TX said:
May 1st, 2009 at 8:40 am
I believe that is correct. But still an ass clown who will never get the job his coaching ability qualifies him for because he is an ass clown.
Winning does not erase bad breeding.
Outback said:
May 1st, 2009 at 8:43 am
Is the remarkable similarity between the tone of the post immediately above and Sherman’s attempts at responding to Leach mere concidence, or is it indicative of a pattern?
Harsh Reality said:
May 1st, 2009 at 8:47 am
“A&M now fights it out with Baylor for 5th place in the division”
This is a fight aggy is losing..
glenn said:
May 1st, 2009 at 9:06 am
thank you, doperbo. you’ve just named the hero in my next novel: akimbo mulletz. he’s in lust with his secretary, dora jahr, and her young daughter, phillie steen, and pretty much leaves his wife back at the house, thistle dew, to play with the fairious gardeners.
oh, these ags, plain and sandy, are a riot to watch. like the three stooges on juice.
cw said:
May 1st, 2009 at 9:08 am
brickhorn, FTW.
Ecurbmanchild said:
May 1st, 2009 at 9:16 am
I like it when Leach shits in the aggy hats!
the Bobs said:
May 1st, 2009 at 9:45 am
I just love it…
Pretty much the only good thing that’s happened to aTm football in the last year – their icon of ‘aggy’ behavior gets drafted and the guy that acted, well, kind of ‘aggy’ towards them does not – and now, instead of letting them sit that in their driveway and lovingly polish it til it gleams maroon in the sunshine, Leach just pisses all over it…
Yeah, I’m still ticked about his stoopid ballot last year, but really, how can you not love the guy when he gets an aggie in his sights?
BatesHorn said:
May 1st, 2009 at 9:51 am
Mike Leach is one entertaining mofo. In a world of coaches who probably use boring coachspeak platitudes even when having sex with their wives
(”Give 110%. Do what you can do. We just can’t put the ball on the ground and expect to win…”)
Leach keeps on making the world an interesting place to live in.
And Nordberg has it right. There’s really no blow too low.
Pretty Pink Panties said:
May 1st, 2009 at 10:12 am
Quit soiling me, aggy!
Ag_in_TX said:
May 1st, 2009 at 10:18 am
The direction of this discussion is distressing. Hence, I direct your attention to Simona Halep, the #496 ranked pro tennis player in the world. She warrants close attention:
Nick Bollittieri said:
May 1st, 2009 at 11:36 am
Won’t crack 300 until she stops running around that backhand.
Dad jokes said:
May 1st, 2009 at 12:25 pm
Ag, I don’t think she serves on your side of the court if you know what I’m saying. You don’t have a Stan’s Smith chance in hell of coverting her.
Halep!! Halep!!
TXinDC said:
May 1st, 2009 at 1:07 pm
Wow… she is… just… wow:
TXinDC said:
May 1st, 2009 at 1:45 pm
No hot linking, huh? Well, everyone’s loss.
Magic Soccer Spray said:
May 1st, 2009 at 2:58 pm
Magic Soccer Spray said:
May 1st, 2009 at 2:58 pm
You are welcome BTW.
Eskimohorn said:
May 1st, 2009 at 3:13 pm
The best thread highjack ever. Anywho – how bout them Cowboys drafting a rag arm quarterback. It’s very disingenous of Sherman to try to blame the injury on the situation. McGee was working his way to the bench from the start.
RansomStoddard said:
May 2nd, 2009 at 5:30 am
It’s great fun watching aggy stare in disbelief at the wreck they call a football program.
the Bobs said:
May 2nd, 2009 at 9:37 am
yeah, I think if I were an aggy football fan, I’d be a lot more familiar with women’s tennis too….
Leg of lamb said:
May 4th, 2009 at 12:32 pm
Doperbo- is this another one of your “personalities”. I cannot keep track anymore. I know you like to throw us a wrench every now and then to throw the readers off. But I am trying to write an autobiography about your life. First you judge-then you tell us you don’t judge. You are beginning to sound abit like Madea in an IkEA commercial, for pete’s sake. I have been reading this blog for sometime and I am pleased they are (finally)letting you blog about hockey. I am anxious to know all of your many, many confusing viewpoints. But as they say; the more you analyze the more you tend to contradict, therefore, you are not really a hippocrit.
Vasherized said:
May 4th, 2009 at 12:55 pm
But I am trying to write an autobiography about your life.
Just making sure nobody missed this little gem.
Bo O. said:
May 4th, 2009 at 2:29 pm
You’d all better know your grammer when you comment on this blog or the BC boys will bite right back (esp. Vasherized and HJ). Think before you type-woof!
clek said:
May 7th, 2009 at 1:16 pm
Doperbo-I thought I saw you wearing a Red Wings t-shirt last year.