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Aggie National Championship

Posted by Scipio Tex on April 20th, 2009 under Uncategorized

It’s called domination.

A&M has now won 6 of the last 7 poultry judging national championships for a total of 23 overall.

The team also took first place in the egg production division and the breeder selection division, and second place in the market products division.

No surprise there: the smart money expected A&M to dominate egg production. Second place in the market products division is actually a good showing – you can’t just expect to beat South Dakota St in their field of expertise. The surprise here, of course, is how easily the Aggies won the breeder selection division.

For the fifth time in a row, the top contestant was an Aggie. Mallori Williams of Refugio was the high individual overall winner and won third place in the breeder selection division, the egg production division and the market products division.

Mallori didn’t win any individual event though. Illustrating the Aggie way of winning: superior meat-judging depth and Aggie spirit.

Nathan Fuchs of Cameron took third place individual overall. Brian Zbikowski of Rockdale won fifth place overall, and Joshua Garcia of La Vernia took sixth place in the egg production division.

Nathan correctly identified that one of the hens had gotten into an onion patch. Future line manager at Tyson, IMHO!

Look, I know these are just kids, but I expected more from Zbikowski. How is it he can tell a giblet from a wing at thirty paces in practice while filing his nails, but when you get him in the meat locker in front of the cameras, with the Yell Leaders leading cheers, he melts down to 5th? Goddamn you, Zbikowski. You’re like the Reggie McNeal of meat-judging. Are you afraid of their talons?

The Wall Street Journal also had an expose on the pressure-filled, shadowy world of meat judging.

What price victory?

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30 Responses

  1. HenryJames said:

    April 20th, 2009 at 10:57 am

    [dedfischer tears off his FFA jacket and runs from the room crying.]

  2. ponderos said:

    April 20th, 2009 at 11:00 am

    Did the poultry have large talons?

  3. Steve Nebraska said:

    April 20th, 2009 at 11:02 am

    *

  4. Scipio Tex said:

    April 20th, 2009 at 11:03 am

    Steve made me laugh.

  5. Art Vandelay said:

    April 20th, 2009 at 11:11 am

    Let me understand. You’ve got the hen, the chicken and the rooster. The rooster goes with the chicken. So, who’s having sex with the hen?

  6. Eskimohorn said:

    April 20th, 2009 at 11:28 am

    Fantasy Meat Judging League. Who’s with me!!??!! Of course, whoever get Williams from Refugio wins every year. He’s the Ladanian Tomlinson of FMJ. Unless he tears a feed bag, you’re good.

  7. Pokey said:

    April 20th, 2009 at 11:38 am

    I was dissapointed that none of my Cowboys made it to the finals.

    Wait until next year!

  8. NateHeupel said:

    April 20th, 2009 at 12:20 pm

    “It’s called domination.”

    I thought it was called bestiality. Oh well. To each his own.

  9. dedfischer said:

    April 20th, 2009 at 12:24 pm

    Just like the Aggies, man. We like to call it the Other White Meat Judging. Real Meat Judging begins and ends in Lubbock. And FFA is the fucking shit.

  10. mike said:

    April 20th, 2009 at 12:28 pm

    “The championship competitions are presented twice each year.”

    Twice a year, not once. Only an Aggie competition could be set up this way. Nice way to collect titles.

  11. dedfischer said:

    April 20th, 2009 at 12:32 pm

    Chicks dig guys who know exactly how to use specific pieces of meat.

  12. Spawn of Cthulhu said:

    April 20th, 2009 at 12:47 pm

    That article from the WSJ was entertaining. The author must’ve enjoyed writing it.

  13. 3rd I Blind said:

    April 20th, 2009 at 1:32 pm

    How many Tate Pittmans does it take to have a cock judging contest? Does girth trump length?

  14. RansomStoddard said:

    April 20th, 2009 at 2:01 pm

    aggy: the gift that keeps on giving. You can’t make this stuff up.

  15. BEHorn said:

    April 20th, 2009 at 2:31 pm

    It’s not a real NC unless there’s a playoff.

  16. Sixth Street said:

    April 20th, 2009 at 2:35 pm

    The rooster has sex with all of them.

  17. Sasha_Is_A_Longhorn_Dog said:

    April 20th, 2009 at 5:26 pm

    I request a “link to Facebook” button. I MUST pass this on to all my little Aggie friends…

  18. Facebook User said:

    April 20th, 2009 at 5:27 pm

    Sasha – It’s up there. Click the Share This icon.

  19. Sasha_Is_A_Longhorn_Dog said:

    April 20th, 2009 at 5:37 pm

    See, that I didn’t know. But I’m a girl. I have to worry about high heels, make-up, and making sure my butt looks good in jeans. Important information like the BC FB button tends to get overlooked.

    Thanks!

  20. Bookman said:

    April 20th, 2009 at 6:03 pm

    Brian Zbikowski has been a disappointment. Bantystars.com gave him a five star rating and he was a Tyson All American coming out of high school. He’s cross-eyed, which allows him to judge two chickens at the same time.

    His recruitment was a hard-fought battle between A&M and Texas Tech. Tech usually gets those guys out of Rockdale, but the Ags prevailed.

    I heard that his mom was driving a brand new maroon Silverado the week before he signed.

  21. Eskimohorn said:

    April 20th, 2009 at 6:24 pm

    “Tyson All American”

    Bookman, well done.

  22. scagnetti said:

    April 21st, 2009 at 2:00 am

    Ah, now THAT was restaurant quality!!!

  23. Ag_in_TX said:

    April 21st, 2009 at 5:01 am

    At least there are no astericks on our Championships.

  24. hiphopopotamus said:

    April 21st, 2009 at 5:17 am

    Ag_in_TX with the hammer drop! Watch out for this guy.

  25. Art Vandelay said:

    April 21st, 2009 at 5:42 am

    “Brian Zbikowski has been a disappointment. Bantystars.com gave him a five star rating and he was a Tyson All American coming out of high school. He’s cross-eyed, which allows him to judge two chickens at the same time.”

    Yes, but did you see him at the Bo Pilgrim classic? The guy can _____ the chicken.

  26. the Bobs said:

    April 21st, 2009 at 5:52 am

    Misspelled internet smack… that’s pure ag, baby!!!

  27. coach Callahan said:

    April 21st, 2009 at 9:01 am

    I would assume since aggie was involved that some of the catagories included wetness, heat and overall tightness. Zbikowski would have scored higher if he would have done a better job of wrapping his chicken in electrical tape so it didn’t explode when he fucked it.

  28. Scipio Tex said:

    April 21st, 2009 at 9:19 am

    Look, you guys can snipe all you want. Aggies have scoreboard here. Bow down.

  29. coach Callahan said:

    April 21st, 2009 at 11:11 am

    By the way, is it true that at aTm they have actually taught a chicken to do kagles?

  30. Jene Surina said:

    January 8th, 2010 at 8:02 am

    Schoene Seite! Dein Beitrag ist interessant. Danke dafuer.

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