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Posted by Scipio Tex on December 31st, 2008 under Football
Buck Burnette gave us stupid, Marquise Slocum gave us the Fuck Lion, and Dez Bryant reminds us all of how quickly a generation gap can develop.

Some choice excerpts are paired with the thematic stylings of Lil Wayne:
Quote: Im not a stunna,im a show off and i aint seen a mill yet just wait you gone really see me go off!!!
Interests? Football, Basketball, and fucking with people
About me: ..? ? ..? ..
Heroes: Myself
His comments section is Faulknerian.
College Football, Fuck Lion, I wanna be a cowboy, Marques Slocum
Black Scholes commented on the blog post Texas Hoops vs. Wake Forest: Post Mortem 2 hours, 14 minutes ago
lawdog – on the topic of regression, this crew can’t compare with the senior seasons Thomas and Atchley put up. Something ain’t right in this scenario. Mason topped out his sophomore year and Pittman last year.
Wangmene is ‘Manos de Piedra’ redux, so that was really never going to work out.
Kevin Berger wrote a new blog post: Top Ten Reasons Why Cal Can Beat Duke 4 hours, 13 minutes ago
This would probably go a bit better if you read it in your Bobby Knight voice and it had two decades worth of goodwill built up from its gratuitous appearance on a popular late night television show. But oh well.
1) Interior Worries. As in the Bears shouldn’t have any defensively
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Kevin Berger wrote a new blog post: Round 2 Saturday Recaps 5 hours, 10 minutes ago
We talked about the upset of the decade in this post, but I watched some other great basketball today I’d like to comment on.
For me, the theme of the day was well-played basketball. I’m not only talking about what Northern Iowa did, I’m talking about the other seven games being really well
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Sailor Ripley commented on the blog post Madness Magic: Northern Iowa Upsets Kansas 5 hours, 23 minutes ago
Just a phenomenal game.
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Sailor Ripley commented on the blog post Recapping The South 5 hours, 35 minutes ago
Udoh was a fargging beast in that game. Very athletic player.
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Sailor Ripley commented on the blog post Because We’re Dedicated To Doing Stupid Things – Tiny Gallon Reportedly Took Payout 5 hours, 59 minutes ago
Jesus. I think I see four horseman on the horizon.
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Kevin Berger wrote a new blog post: Madness Magic: Northern Iowa Upsets Kansas 6 hours, 2 minutes ago
Today reminded me why I love this tournament so much. A good friend of mine mentioned to me that college basketball is the great equalizer of all athletic endeavors. At least of the sports we care about. He’s right.
For instance, you can have a 40 inch vertical, be Iverson quick,
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Nate Heupel commented on the blog post Because We’re Dedicated To Doing Stupid Things – Tiny Gallon Reportedly Took Payout 6 hours, 6 minutes ago
Patrick,
Unless you’re completely retarded, you know precisely what I meant. The closest any Big 12 team has gotten to winning the infamous Fuller Cup is the 2007 Texas squad. I can’t remember a team being that horribly undisciplined as a whole aside from the insane OU teams of the 80’s. That’s not
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Nate Heupel commented on the blog post Because We’re Dedicated To Doing Stupid Things – Tiny Gallon Reportedly Took Payout 6 hours, 6 minutes ago
Patrick,
Unless you’re completely retarded, you know precisely what I meant. The closest any Big 12 team has gotten to winning the infamous Fulmer Cup is the 2007 Texas squad. I can’t remember a team being that horribly undisciplined as a whole aside from the insane OU teams of the 80’s. That’s not
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Sailor Ripley wrote a new blog post: This Is Sparta! 6 hours, 19 minutes ago
Please make yourself welcome and Adam will be by shortly to keep you up to date on all Michigan State Spartan happenings.
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Nickel Rover commented on the blog post Barnes worst team 6 hours, 23 minutes ago
I suppose anyone could be your “favorite Longhorn basketball player” but Ford did more than just about anyone…although Durant is clearly better. Ford’s supporting cast was better than Durant’s in his sophomore year. Durant’s had more talent (Augustin, James, Abrams) but Ford’s was more developed (Boddicker, Ivey, Mouton, Thomas) and had worked with him for
Nickel Rover commented on the blog post Bradley or Hamilton? 6 hours, 30 minutes ago
Crazy Joe, your thoughts intrigue me and I would like to subscribe to your newsletter.
Nickel Rover commented on the blog post Bradley or Hamilton? 6 hours, 33 minutes ago
This notion of Hamilton as being a disaster area on defense is all a bit much. He rebounds extremely well which, if it wasn’t obvious, is extremely important in this game since it secures possession of the basketball. Winning in basketball is achieved through the scoring of baskets and it’s necessary to possess the basketball
Ojnab Bob commented on the blog post Best Opening Round I Can Remember 6 hours, 43 minutes ago
I posted earlier about how Collins’ effort just crippled Kansas today, but what amazed me the most was his complete inability to stay in front of his man on defense. UNI got a LOT of good looks out of penetration/pass after one of UNI’s modestly gifted athletes blew right by Sherron. The best
Scipio Tex wrote a new blog post: Best Opening Round I Can Remember 7 hours, 55 minutes ago
At least it’s shaping up that way if Sunday delivers.
As disappointed as I was in last year’s opening weekend of March Madness, this one is exceeding all expectations. Putting aside the fact that my bracket now resembles Kabul after the Taliban rolled through in ‘96 – a map of ordered failure –
J commented on the blog post Bid Dance: Day Three 8 hours, 22 minutes ago
Thanks for the kind words, Trips.
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J commented on the blog post Bid Dance: Day Three 8 hours, 22 minutes ago
You know who’s bitter and angry as fuck? This guy —> ME.
I can only hope our returning players (whoever that may be) remember this and realize they need to play motivated EVERY FUCKING GAME and put forward 40 MINUTES of effort each game.
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Raoul Duke commented on the blog post Rumor Alert–TMG 8 hours, 54 minutes ago
Kid seems like a fantastic collegiate player. I haven’t seen any NBA info. Is he a legit prospect?
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Raoul Duke commented on the blog post Bid Dance: Day Three 9 hours ago
Tough day for Sherron on O and D.
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GoHornsGo90 commented on the blog post Bradley or Hamilton? 9 hours, 45 minutes ago
To leave or stay?
Patrick Bateman commented on the blog post NCAA Tournament Open Thread: Weekend Edition 9 hours, 46 minutes ago
KSU moving on led by a hot shooting Pullen. BTW, White Mormons can shoot FTs. 22 for 25, I think. Imagine if we could shoot like that.
Wake’s coming back on Kentucky. They’re within 25 right now…..
Trips Right commented on the blog post Bid Dance: Day Three 10 hours, 4 minutes ago
Just wanted to say I feel for you guys. As a Texas fan I know how this feels even if it’s from a football perspective.
I still think you’re the best basketball team in the country, and unfortunately you ran into a team that packed a Villanova circa 1985 type game today. Meaning they
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ghostofagroundgame commented on the blog post NCAA Tournament Open Thread: Weekend Edition 10 hours, 13 minutes ago
Wow. Wake won’t break 50. Not surprising really — we should have beaten Wake and they are not a very good team.
Patrick Bateman commented on the blog post NCAA Tournament Open Thread: Weekend Edition 10 hours, 19 minutes ago
Kentucky doing their best to beat Wake by half hundred. Close call….
RRR wrote a new blog post: Survive and Advance 10 hours, 22 minutes ago
We really struggled in the first half, but battled through it to get a tough win against Jacksonville. On to Oxford!
Forget what conference they play in, Jacksonville is a very good basketball team, and they got to Lubbock not because of a crazy bank shot at the buzzer in Phoenix, but by playing aggressive, intense defense for
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ghostofagroundgame commented on the blog post NCAA Tournament Open Thread: Weekend Edition 10 hours, 40 minutes ago
The shamrock is on his left shoulder. The Griffin looking thing is on his right.
ghostofagroundgame commented on the blog post NCAA Tournament Open Thread: Weekend Edition 10 hours, 49 minutes ago
Everytime I see a Gumbel brother I think of “Gumbel to Gumbel”
Patrick Bateman commented on the blog post NCAA Tournament Open Thread: Weekend Edition 11 hours, 2 minutes ago
Kentucky starting to pile on Wake. That would have been our fate…..
KSU just killing the Mormons on the glass…
Patrick Bateman commented on the blog post NCAA Tournament Open Thread: Weekend Edition 11 hours, 29 minutes ago
10 point lead for the Mormons again…
ghostofagroundgame commented on the blog post NCAA Tournament Open Thread: Weekend Edition 11 hours, 44 minutes ago
This is the first-time Frank Martin has ever met a Mormon who wasn’t on a bicycle.
© 2009 Fantake. All rights reserved unless otherwise indicated.
HenryJames said:
December 31st, 2008 at 8:38 am
Was his ‘About me:’ reply written in Morse Code?
TexasDawg said:
December 31st, 2008 at 8:59 am
I think he was intending to start a game of hangman with that section.
DBH said:
December 31st, 2008 at 8:59 am
“His comments section is Faulknerian.”
I haven’t heard the “N” word that much since Richard Pryor stopped using it.
Benjy said:
December 31st, 2008 at 9:26 am
Caddy uncaught Dez and we crawled through. Uncle Gundy said to not let anybody see us, so we better stoop over, Caddy said. Stoop over, Dez. Like this, see. We stooped over and crossed the garden, where the flowers rasped and rattled against us. The ground was hard. We climbed the fence, where the pigs were grunting and snuffing. I expect they’re sorry because one of them got killed today, Caddy said. The ground was hard, churned and knotted. Keep your hands in your pockets, Caddy said. Or they’ll get froze. You dont want your hands froze on Christmas, do you.
Steve Nebraska said:
December 31st, 2008 at 9:30 am
I also noticed under “Heroes” he put himself.
And apparently, he is engaged.
Scipio Tex said:
December 31st, 2008 at 11:44 am
He is engaged to himself.
Me this afternoon said:
December 31st, 2008 at 11:48 am
Honey?? When is the private school tuition due for little Johnny??!!??
Doperbo said:
December 31st, 2008 at 12:18 pm
I laud him for drawing a clear distinction between the ’show offs’ and ’stunnas’. Sorely needed. Let’s put an end to the confusion once and for all. Kudos, Dez.
t1climb1 said:
December 31st, 2008 at 1:59 pm
I think Fucking with People is under consideration by the IOC for inclusion into the 2012 summer games in London. Dez hopes if he is in the NFL at that time it won’t interfere with his amateur Fuck with status.
98 said:
December 31st, 2008 at 2:38 pm
Pitt OSU game singlehandedly was responsible for the death of a 1000 puppies.
Phenomenal Smith said:
December 31st, 2008 at 2:54 pm
He’s going to make a perfect NFL WR.
Newy25 said:
December 31st, 2008 at 4:05 pm
Sweet Marry Mother of God. Is he related to James Henry or Andre Jones?
Art Vandelay said:
December 31st, 2008 at 4:05 pm
Isn’t Fucking with People an organization made up of troupes which sing and perform internationally??? It’s nice that he is giving back to the community.
Jeff said:
December 31st, 2008 at 4:26 pm
Not the best week for Lufkin, Texas and its favorite sons.
Dez said:
December 31st, 2008 at 4:48 pm
Me Hate Me
Facebook User said:
December 31st, 2008 at 5:27 pm
This describes everyone on this blog.
Up with People said:
December 31st, 2008 at 6:44 pm
Damn these kids today….
Spawn of Cthulhu said:
January 1st, 2009 at 7:05 am
Thanks to Benjy for bringing back the nightmare of trying to understand The Sound and The Fury.
Capt. Insano said:
January 1st, 2009 at 7:12 am
Fuck Lion had me in tears. That is some seriously funny shit.
“WHEN ARE YOU FUCKERS GOING TO BUY AN EDIT BUTTON!?!?!”
Parlin Hall said:
January 1st, 2009 at 8:44 am
“Thanks to Benjy for bringing back the nightmare of trying to understand The Sound and The Fury.”
Once you get Benjy, Greg Davis’s gameplans become clear.
Running north-and-south = Going the wrong way around the statue of the Confederate soldier.
Horn In Exile said:
January 1st, 2009 at 10:21 am
One of his “friends” is Dezmon Briscoe from KU…who, btw, had the best bowl game for a guy named Dez.
http://www.myspace.com/yellaniggafromthasouth
Scipio Tex said:
January 1st, 2009 at 11:24 am
That is gold. Nicely done, Horn in Exile.
He went for 201 and 3 TDs last night, so his headline is pretty accurate.
98 said:
January 1st, 2009 at 11:33 am
after watching stafford try to run a 2 minute offense i hope the lions draft stafford. they are meant for each other.
Atomic Teeth » Blog Archive » Favorite Non-Tigers said:
August 11th, 2009 at 12:06 pm
[...] this kid is a punk who will fit right in with NFL WRs like TO, Ochocinco, and Randy Moss. See BC’s report of Bryant’s Myspace page for an example of punkness. Still, his electrifying, dynamic, dazzling, and delightful play on the field makes him almost [...]