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Auburn hires Texas defensive coordinator as head coach

Posted by HenryJames on December 13th, 2008 under Football

Former Texas defensive coordinator that is.

ESPN, the same network that reported Auburn hired current Texas DC Will Muschamp two days ago, now says Auburn has hired Iowa State coach Gene Chizik as its next head coach.

What could go wrong?

The Cyclones went winless in Big 12 play this season, and their win total has dipped in each of the past three seasons.

Last week, Chizik stripped offensive coordinator Robert McFarland and defensive coordinator Wayne Bolt of those duties and reassigned them within the staff. He also fired quarterbacks coach Tony Petersen and secondary coach Shawn Raney.

Oh, right.

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29 Responses

  1. bighornfan32 said:

    December 13th, 2008 at 2:27 pm

    Auburn is SEC aggy. They expect great things when they had it about as good as it was gonna get.

  2. You can’t write satire this funny. Most delusional fan base ever.

  3. You scared me. Don’t do that again please.

  4. Well. Can’t wait to see Auburn fans 3 years from now, longing for the good ol’ days of the Tubberville era.

  5. dasmithjones said:

    December 13th, 2008 at 4:37 pm

    Dangit Scip, don’t do that!!!

  6. OT – gilbert is tearing it up in the playoffs.
    imagine the numbers he would put up in our “junk” offense

  7. Levander Williams said:

    December 13th, 2008 at 4:58 pm

    Are they serious? Chizik?

    This screams panic hire. Or comfort hire. Or both.

    13-0 must seem like a very long time ago for these guys.

  8. I think it screams “we missed out on our first 8 choices, and had to default back to Chizik.”

  9. Chizik? Seriously?

    WTF do I have to do to get out of Lubbock?

  10. Truly unreal. How charismatic can a guy name Gene really be? Because even Aubies can’t look at his resume and be impressed, especially after seeing what Muschamp just did with A LOT less pure talent.

  11. Most delusional fan base ever.

    There is something really really funny about UT fans calling another fanbase delusional.
    I love reading this site and the humor, but unreal arrogance of some Texas fans is unreal.

  12. Our unreal arrogance is unreal? So…if our arrogance is not real, but that’s also not real, what is the nature of reality? Thanks for the zen koan.

    As to your point, what exactly makes us delusional? We tend to be hyper self-critical, if anything.

    Auburn acted in this matter as if they were a Top 5 college job. They’re a bottom of the top 20 program – probably the 6th best job in the SEC. And they ended up with a horrible reach when the free market told them just what they thought of them. That’s the definition of delusion.

  13. Unreally, dude, your unreal arrogance is just really unreal, and it’s so unreally unreal that it’s just really unreally delusional. I’m just tryin’ to keep it real…er, unreal here, dude. Really.

  14. Well said, Eyes…I think.

  15. Pitchin Paul said:

    December 14th, 2008 at 7:32 am

    Saban has to be laughing his butt off. His arch rival has hired an idiot for head coach. I give him 2 years max. As for Iowa State they never ever should have fired McCarney

  16. [...] in Ames are being lauded today after sliding out from under huge losses by dumping illiquid default credit swaps to a drunk pompadour banker waving a cavalry sword [...]

  17. Minnesotahorn said:

    December 14th, 2008 at 11:11 am

    I’m not really sure what arrogance is involved in pronouncing judgement on this hire. To just about anyone this looks like an extremely rash decision made out of unreal expectations about who desired the job. Unless you somehow believe that Chizik was the desired man all along and that you’d better get in on his 5-19 ass before someone else scooped him up.

  18. Minnesota, I laughed.

  19. Yamon Figurs said:

    December 14th, 2008 at 2:53 pm

    Gene Chizik deserves this oppotunity for everything he has done for me in my career.

  20. Hey, great move for the Chizzer. Nothing was going to change in Ames.

    He can take his base 4-3 defense rife with a lack of in-game planning and halftime adjustments while continue Auburn’s tradition of persistent underachievement.

    It’s unreal how great of a fit it is, really.

  21. Horn in Tyler said:

    December 14th, 2008 at 6:32 pm

    Chizik is custom-made for a league where you can win 3-2.

  22. Congratulations Auburn, you just hired a coach who went 0-8 in the Big 12 — without playing OU, Tech or Texas.

  23. Bart Giamatti said:

    December 14th, 2008 at 7:41 pm

    “Chizik is custom-made for a league where you can win 3-2.”

    The American League?

  24. Horn in Tyler said:

    December 14th, 2008 at 7:59 pm

    Esteemed (deceased) commissioner, Auburn beat offensive powerhouse Mississippi State 3-2 in September.

  25. Minnesotahorn said:

    December 15th, 2008 at 5:39 am

    There don’t think there’s been a score that low in the American League in 15 years.

  26. Minnesotahorn said:

    December 15th, 2008 at 5:40 am

    Oof. “I don’t think there’s been…” obvisouly.

  27. Bart Giamatti said:

    December 15th, 2008 at 5:41 am

    (rolling over in his grave)

    National, then.

  28. Dexter Manley said:

    December 15th, 2008 at 2:36 pm

    Everbody can read the writing on the wall with this hire.

    Well…except me.

  29. Facebook User said:

    December 17th, 2008 at 9:45 am

    Tales of the Super Agent.

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