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Tyrell Gatewood has a grandparent with glaucoma, a sibling with anxiety disorder and a baby with a cough

Posted by HenryJames on September 13th, 2007 under Football

 height=Ho hum. Another Texas football player got arrested last night.

Senior Tyrell Gatewood was arrested early Thursday morning and charged with two counts of possession of a dangerous drug.

Gatewood was pulled over after he failed to signal a turn, and after smelling marijuana, the cop searched Gatewood’s car and found “pot, Xanax and a baby bottle full of codeine cough syrup.”

Freshman Ben Wells was with Gatewood, and he was released after being cited for possession of drug paraphernalia. At least now the coaches have a reason for not playing him.

Texas can now expect to move up a few spots when the next Fulmer Cup standings are released.

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14 Responses

  1. Jesus balls. Now I know what it was like to be a Miami fan in the 90s.

  2. E. Texas Life said:

    September 13th, 2007 at 10:46 am

    You can take the boy out of East Texas but you can’t take the East Texas out of the boy.

    I guar-own-tee than MANY players on aggy, LSU, Texas and Okie State are drinking lean (prescription cough syrup) and smoking weed regularly.

    That is what they do in E. Texas/S.Lousiana

  3. Levander Williams said:

    September 13th, 2007 at 11:41 am

    Wasn’t Gatewood caught with Tarell Brown last year before the Ohio State game? And didn’t Wells learn anything from seeing Dre Jones get hooked up?

    Genius.

  4. At least he wasn’t wearing an astronaut diaper.

  5. This just in: Pete Gardere pulled over for DWI.

  6. jesus, when you are a black man in america you just don’t drive around town sucking on a baby bottle, that is a recipe for disaster.

  7. You laugh, but that baby bottle won’t spill a damn drop when he wraps his car around a tree.

  8. I bet Wells and Gatewood are so redfaced about not having any firearms.

  9. You boys drug problems are just gettin started. Wait until O’Leary puts some lsd’s in your water bottles on Saturday. Your boys will be seeing tracers and shit. I wonder how your kickers gonna like it when the goal post melts.

    Of course, if he drugs the coaches too, your run game might improve a bit.

  10. Facebook User said:

    September 13th, 2007 at 1:25 pm

    Socratic channeling Spider. I must’ve just confused bag of skittles with some “LSD’s”.

    Chooky – Well played.

  11. “Jesus balls. Now I know what it was like to be a Miami fan in the 90s.”

    Except that the Miami fans were getting arrested at an even faster clip.

  12. Still pussy shit. I’ll respect our efforts at gangsterism more when our guys start pistol whipping people and selling Cambodians into cargo ship slavery rings.

  13. This is getting old. Don’t get me wrong. I live in a glass house. I understand that Texas actually surpassed Colorado as the biggest party school in our conference last year. I went to Texas in the mid-70’s. Hell, I thought it was a huge party school back then. It wasn’t Animal House Party, it was something akin to LSD, and mediocre pot meets beer. It was Kurt Vonnegut and every Communications major reading the Medium is Massage in Mass Communications. Willie, Waylon and Outlaw music ruled. Oh yea, I have never done LSD. There.

    Having said that, I think that there are a lot of upper classmen wearing big rings that never started for the ‘05 National Championship team. The feel good party must end eventually. This is not the first time that a veteran, if not an upperclassman, has lead a true All American Freshman down the wrong path (see Andre Jones). Andre occured during summer, and this one during the fucking season! We got some lazy bastards in the woodpile who think that winning comes naturally because they play at Texas. That’s my take.

  14. I’ll be disappointed if a meth lab bust tied to at least three Texas players in the two deep is not reported by the Spring.

    Lets at least make some progress.

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